Creepers, ick. They’re in every religion but it seems Modern Paganism has a special breed. They’re usually guys, most likely middle aged, near it or beyond it, and prey on gullibility. Forget social, these guys just try to charm anything with a punami and preferably under the age of 25. They lean on the whole “Horned God” aspect to the point it’s pretty transparent they couldn’t care less about religion, just how quick it can get a girl in their bed and how slow it can make them talk to a police officer about it.

Exhibit A:

The Old Goat seeks young worshipers*

Hi I am The Old Goat and am 49 years old
I live in constantine, KY , US
The Old Goat is ofcourse a Horny old devil…and seeks only the most energetic maidens and
ladies for deep worshipful relationships. Desire immediate responses from those desiring to form
a true coven…live-in is available for the most sincere supplicants…have room for upto 8
devotees. A journey together towards the innermost realms of wisdom, understanding, and
pleasure. Single, Divorced, Widowed, if you have pets or children your are still welcome plenty
of room on my country property 20 miles west of Elizabethtown / 69 miles south of Louisville
Ky. A completely unified group is necessary, therefore only those seeking a true communal
coven experience should reply…cooperation and mutual love a must ! We will form a Non-profit
Religeous Organization and work together towards goals of self sufficiency, educational
outreach, and deprograming the biased “Christian” mindset in the world around us….ofcourse
concentrating also on coven cerimony, rit

There was another I found but it was too embarrassing to post here, mainly for the guy, not me. That and I have kid readers, I don’t really want well-deserved hate mail from disgruntled parents. You can look around for it, of course but I think sites are getting better at detecting this predatory stuff – or the predators are super well blended at this point, peppering their pseudo-knowledge with “No one understands but you, you have the gift. I could refine that gift” or “the government does not want to me to teach this but I will anyways because you are the perfect person for it. Training will be strenuous” and other wack things to younger, more gullible folks

Let’s break down what this guy got here:

* Pedo-vibe encrusted title – Check
* Within range of being a target audience for the AARP – Check
* Thinly veiled “I wanna get in your pants – but in the name of religion!” first sentence? – Check
* Distorts the definition of religious proceedings and groups (“a true coven”) – Ka-chek
* Pretty much wants to create his own harem of sex-kittens, in the name of “religion” – Check
* Promise to pretty much to give you the moon in knowledge and wisdom – yep, check
* Sounds like this dude wants to create a compound that would peak the interest of the FBI – Check
* Wants absolute trust – check
* When he says “mutual love”, it means “absolute control” – check
* Wants to pull a sham to go tax-free and to create false legitimacy – Nice trick, still, check
* Wants to deprogram the “biased ‘Christian’ mindset” – Yeah right, check
* Women only – I seriously want a guy to apply just to read the reaction, check

This dude is about as wack and rachet as all things. Good grief, he sounds like a comic book nerd that bought a little too much into those tales. Now, I can pick up the nonsense and fluff miles away but more impressionable women and girls who are new to the craft may actually buy into this. It may sound like this dude is totally liberating and soooooo different from the usual “Christian” ideals but he’s just preying on any chick lacking any sense that something is amiss. You can’t always call the girl stupid because though this dude couldn’t get any more blatant about his real intentions, they’re usually more trickier than this. I should know, creepers like this would contact me when I was about 16 or so through WitchVox. The younger you are, the more you attract, which is pretty disturbing.

In short, if anybody writes to you like this, simply run. Run fast, run far and run away. And if they’re letters like these, before you run, please forward a copy to the FBI or their local police department.

And that’s the column for this week! Everyone, I would like you to know that I will be at the CityLit Festival in Baltimore, MD tomorrow and possibly at the Ting Tings concert. So if you wanna bug me, there’s your chance.

The winner for the poetry contest will be announced at midnight so if you haven’t submitted, do it nao! Check out the About Me/Contact Me to find out how to send them.