Category: Race


History: Stuck on Repeat

We’re about six weeks away from the inauguration, which is strongly concerning. Hate crimes are spiking, according to the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) and will only be expected to rise even with the inauguration and well into the new administration. The one thing I’m most concerned about is the possible likelihood of forced retention of mass groups of people based on religious, cultural, racial or disability status. Basically, camps…and not the fun, marshmallow-at-a-bonfire-with-sing-a-long kind of camps. More like the human-rights-violations-everywhere-everyone-is-gonna-look-back-on-this-and-puke-or-make-hella-excuses kind.

Granted, given I have a mostly American audience, meaning a good chunk of my readership probably slept their way well through Government & Civics and their political science courses…or simply got a crappy education. This spells out that some folks probably are gonna say, “Camps totally can’t happen here! We have checks and balances! Germany had a different system! We have the freedom of due process and our amendments.”

Firstly, if you said the last sentence, it’s an 85% chance you’re probably intensely delusional. Both recent and not-so-recent history has held these truths to be quite not evident.

Secondly, during World War II, America had Internment Camps, also known as American Concentration Camps (as recommended and expressed by the Japanese American Citizens League (JACL) in their Power of Words Handbook). This was while America was at war with the Axis of Evil (Germany, Italy, Japan). Note, only Japanese Americans were detained only, no German Americans or Italian Americans.

If you never heard of the Internment Camps/American Concentration Camps, don’t feel too bad, let Linkin Park’s Mike Shinoda bring you up to speed with his song Kenji on his solo album Fort Minor: The Rising Tied

Imaginative, no? Here is another that breaks everything down on the historical, government-y side, because you do need all sides (or as many as possible) of an argument enable to make an argument:

Here’s the thing: all in all, all of this was government sanctioned. Thought up by the president, passed by the Congress, defended by the Supreme Court a couple years later (Korematsu v. United States). Not only was this greenlit, it was even portrayed as if the Japanese Americans were totally cool with it (because they’re so obedient! Those loyal model minorities! If only all minorities could be so accommodating, like those nig– uh…no minority group in particular, just a general wish upon a star, heh heh.) And that the US Government were simply doing the right thing: it was wartime, everyone has got to understand. Better safe than sorry, that’s why there were camps for Japanese Americans, German Americans and Italian Americans…oh, wait. The two latter never happened, only Japanese Americans got cuffed.

Here is a war propaganda video read out by General Milton S. Eisenhower, the first director* of the War Relocation Authority (WRA, and “Relocation” can be reworded to “Incarceration”, according to the JACL handbook), and brother of later president Dwight E. Eisenhower (you’ve seen him, he’s on the dime). Played by Periscope Films, you can view this and more on Denshō’s Youtube channel.

How charming! It’s like a mini society! Watch them “J*ps” work so hard and diligently, building houses, having schools, letting their rights be taken away. It’s practically a Norman Rockwell painting of the American spirit of perseverance…and he did indeed cover WWII:

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Feel the Americana! Feel the togetherness!

How delightful. And heartwarming. Almost like Mike Shinoda just painted a dreary picture on a very picturesque situation simply because he wasn’t there, just his dad.

Oh, wait, George Takei was there, too. And it sounds like from his personal, lived experience, Shinoda’s take is a lot more accurate than Gen. Eisenhower. It didn’t sound like a fun trip to the desert, it sounded a lot like being suspected, rounded up and detained because of a crime never committed. Kinda like what the TSA does now to anyone dark enough to be “suspicious” in airports. Or what police does to civilians dark enough to be “suspicious”. Or what FBI agents does and did to countless Muslim Americans (and with a chance for a one-way ticket to Cuba for an indefinite stay at the Gitmo resort), because “suspicious”. Man, I wonder why White guys didn’t get rounded up by the payload when Timothy McVeigh did the Oklahoma City Bombings. You can check out more first-hand accounts here at Densho.org or on their Youtube. I strongly recommend it.  Actually, let’s see George Takei talk about his experience in the camps:

The reason why this happened is because of the rising anti-Japanese sentiment many Americans had before and during WWII: that the Japanese were evil, sneaky, rat faced and intensely vicious in their sleeper attacks. You couldn’t predict them so might as well bound all of them up to make sure. That without the Japanese, Americans could live safer…by detaining Americans with reckless abandon. Kinda like now with talks of a “Muslim registry”. There was plenty of media about that depicted Japanese people as inherently “other” and someone to vanquish, mock and despise.

“Commander Duck”

“Tokio Jokio”

Oh yeah, such open mindedness will breed from these films and many like them. Just like all the movies and first person shooter games that are set in the Middle East create such warm and happy feelings about those who practice Islamic faith. And in “Commando Duck”, a hidden Japanese stereotype militaryman said “Oh no, no wait please – Japanese custom say ‘always shooting a man in the back’, please.” Funny that, it’s what American soldiers did to Japanese Americans when they were in the camps because, well, Americans don’t gel well with being detained in mass prisons for bullsh*t reasons. Watch the retelling of the “Manzanar Riot”, witnessed by Richard Yamashiro.

This official propaganda, which was constantly everywhere, is similar to how Germany had films about “the evilness of the Jew”, by showing Jewish people in normal marketplace environment and playing it up as how they are just such a cancer to the German way of life.

Here is German propaganda pretending the camps and the ghettos** are totally nice places, that the Jews are totally being respected while despised.

And what actually happened, as shown by Youtuber Miles Jai. Press play to start at the marker:

Frankly, it’s concerning because all this shows how little protected people are in times of need. And how hatefulness can be super pervasive to the point it’s greenlit as “helping the country/world”. And the worst part? Most get away with doing these atrocities, hiding behind legalities, technicalities, multi-layered and scalpel-like wording – being very careful to mind the red tape so they can dance expertly around it as if this all just was one, big misunderstanding. To be legally perceived as no different than bumping into a stranger on the street and making them drop their baggage.

For example, only about 50 or less Nazi personnel were actually convicted with war crimes, but thousands got off the hook. Most are old and frail now, so the lot of them spent their lives free from any wrongdoing they did. And when they do land in court, all they have to say is “I never physically, personally killed anyone. I was just doing my job.” And off they go, to spend the rest of their golden years in the sunset:

Immense amounts of people suffer, perish and die, just to be pictures and tales of history – as if that’s all these people were born to do, just be cautionary tales – and those who commit such wrongdoings get to have fantastic cop-out arguments while everyone else “ooh” and “aah” about the whole occurrence, which will eventually become a boring and intensely neutered museum exhibit or textbook entry. Sometimes, it seems like very little is done to actually prevent such occurrences, just a bunch of “If only there was another way or we could have seen this coming. Our thoughts and prayers are with the fallen.”

Like now. Just like it happened right after 9/11 when the Muslim population was under intense scrutiny over the attacks, simply because they were Muslim. When FBI started busting down doors of innocent Muslim Americans of various stripes and backgrounds simply because they opted for a Koran and not a Bible to pray to. Apparently being Muslim was enough to justify “suspicion” of terrorism and trash their house.

Sounds familiar? It happened to the Japanese Americans during the 1940s as well:

Geez, this “suspicion” sounds a lot like “intense, racially-induced paranoia”. Because this is the same FBI that can’t seem to spot or stop people like Dylan Roof or prevent Sandy Hook or douse the long standing terrorist group, the Ku Klux Klan, who have performed bombings, attacks on Americans and more. Huh. Interesting.

And now, it’s about to happen again with Trump getting into office. Because all he basically said during his campaign was “noun-verb-geyser of bigotry”. And if anyone thinks that this dude won’t throw us into a war, that person poorly understands how an arrogant, myopic bigot thinks, especially when nuclear launch codes get added to the mix. And it’s usually around wartime and war-leaning times does things like camps get rolling. And do they roll, but gradually, you bet.

First, it always starts small and simple: registries and curfews. Nothing vicious, no one being harmed, just a set bedtime declared by the government. The only folks really hurting are those who love watching late night movies at the theatres. Just abide by the rules and you’re good. In 2002, we didn’t have curfews for Muslims, but we did have a Muslim registry, the “National Security Entry-Exit Registration System” list (NSEERS, also called “Special Registration”), which was stopped in 2011 because its unconstitutional nature. Oh, and the TSA as well since 9/11 was done using planes. No curfew but traveling is well hampered, all thanks to security theatre.

Second, it moves into sectioning groups of people into particular neighborhoods – “ghettos” or strongly zoned areas – so everyone knows where you are. The US already have tons of housing and zoning issues like these already, plenty of areas are greatly segregated.

Third, “relocation efforts” are introduced.

As referenced prior, mainstream media starts to push propaganda of “the enemy” and can back the government as well. They’re currently doing it now to make the Alt-Right/Neo-Nazis appear palatable. Heck, it doesn’t even have to be traditional media, even on Youtube there’s the “bomb prank” where someone dresses up in stereotypical “Arabic”  wear and plops a black bag around someone and runs off:

Yeah, not paid for by Fox News or CNN, this is some individual’s “clever” thinking. They didn’t have to do the super racist costume. Here is an example when someone does the prank without the Islamophobic stuff:

However, a quick search on Youtube shows more Islamophobic versions of the prank than not, with different people conducting the prank.This continually associates Islam with terrorism and very much stokes fears that the American people are under threat of the “evil Muslim”. These pranks are not much different from films like “Tokio Jokio” because they have the same effect, it’s just one was paid for as official propaganda and the other was merely a result of being extensively exposed to anti-Muslim propaganda for over a decade and using such ingrained rhetoric for personal creative works that delivers to a wide audience.

Does all this promise that Trump is totally, totally going to have camps of some sort? It’s a relatively likely possibility, given history itself, his demeanor, his actions and his personal take on everything. Oh, and the fact that one person in his crew already suggested that we bring back Internment Camps. Trump is not at all reasonable and he does not appoint anyone who is. He’s not even in the oval office yet and already making bad choices. This is alarming because it’s just history all over again.

What can people do about this? Well, safety pins are a cute non-solution but I think trying to understand and learn what is happening is best here. On the Black Witch Tumblr, I actually have the “Race and Racism” tag. Try starting there.  That and don’t be like Gen. Eisenhower, actually stand up for your beliefs, not just say, “Oh, I feel queasy about this, let me distance myself to feel better.” If acts of prejudice pop up, do something. Except for “sign up for the Muslim registry to cloud the numbers” because the US Govt used the Census to round up Japanese Americans and to know who gets put on the registry. Then revamped the registry system during Bush Jr. You can sign up but the system already knows it’s a false positive. There’s already a tried-and-tested system waiting. General resistance, like attending protests, openly talking about these issues and more would do better. This doesn’t mean that it will turn Trump’s presidency into a well muted one, but it’s better than just slipping out the back because all this causes bad feelz. I also recommend getting a copy of the ABA book of Human Rights. It’s nifty.

Before I hear, “Both the Jews and the Japanese got reparations! How is this bad?! Free money!” I can tell you from personal experience, going through an immensely prejudiced experience is not worth any amount of money received. If you asked anyone who got fiscal reparations “choose between getting all this money or not ever going through the experience at all”, all of them would say, “never go through it at all.” It doesn’t wipe away the terrible memories that will live forever. It doesn’t wake up the dead that suffered. It changes nothing, just adds a little extra cheddar in their pocket while the government revs up to do it again. This isn’t “free money”, this isn’t like scratching off a winning lotto ticket. The camps weren’t a game show and this isn’t a prize. This is an official “My bad, we’ll be more cunning about it next time.” Sure, the German government, very unlike the American government, actually did make strides to help future German generations understand that Nazism was a terrible thing they did: mandatory field trips to the camps, banning hate speech and symbolism, backing those bans up with severe laws, etc etc. Y’know, taking responsibility. The American government just gets into an emo tizzy and rather sweep things under the rugs. I mean, how many of you actually knew of the American concentration camps

Also, before I hear: “Trump isn’t that bad, he’s just using the ‘build a wall’ nonsense because it got him votes. His real plan is way more nuanced that than. Just too magnificent for the average American to understand.” The New York Times said the same about Hitler:

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The article reads:

But several reliable, well-informed sources confirmed the idea that Hitler’s anti-Semitism was not so genuine or violent as it sounded, and that he was merely using anti-Semitic propaganda as a bait to catch messes of followers and keep them aroused, enthusiastic and in line for the time when his organization is perfected and sufficiently powerful to be employed effectively for political purposes.

A sophisticated politician credited Hitler  with peculiar political cleverness for laying emphasis and over-emphasis on anti-Semitism, saying: “You can’t expect the masses to understand or appreciate your finer real aims. You must feed the masses with cruder morsels and ideas like anti-Semitism. It would be politically all wrong to tell them the truth about where you really are leading them.”

The Hitler movement is not of mere local or picturesque interest. It is bound to bring Bavaria into a renewed clash with the Berlin Government as long as the German Republic goes even through the notions of trying to live up the Versailles Treaty. For it is certain the Allies will take umbrage at the Hitler organization as a violation of the military clauses of the treaty and demand disbandment, even as in the case of its predecessor, the Orgesch.

This would be a funny Hurrr Durrrr moment if it weren’t so terrifying, and verified by Snopes. It’s also such a glowing reason to get your passport straightened out, if possible. And see Takei’s play “Allegiance” if it is in your city, it’s going to be in select movie theatres!

*Granted, Gen. Eisenhower did leave three months later because the camps were bothering him but it doesn’t change what he did. Especially since all he did was dip, not try to close the camps. The least he could have done was boost Korematsu’s stance further. Neither happened. Just left to save his mind, literally no one else. That doesn’t make him a hero, just a coward with temporary moral depression and a cardboard spine.

** By the way, that’s where the American term “ghetto” comes from, because of the same conditions. So if a kid says they’re from the ghetto and live in America, it’s pretty similar when a Jewish kid said the same back in the 30s and 40s. Hooray for White kids who call everything “ghetto” for the lolz. Because why be anti-Black or anti-Semitic when you can be both?

Not My Flag, Not a Chance

There’s been so much chatter since the election, mainly about how terrible Trump is going to be (usually said by practically everyone who isn’t White, Straight, cis, etc) and how we should still give him and his folks a chance (usually said by anyone White and usually Liberal (conservatives just froth at the mouth over admiring swastikas now, imagining the next four years in glee, I’m guessing)).

Frankly, anyone who says we as a nation should give Trump a chance is quite historically challenged and a total ditz. Trump’s troupe blew whatever chance they could have potentially had when they were on the campaign trail talking about walls and mocking disabled reporters…oh and doing covert sieg heils* at the RNC gathering.

Yeah, this happened

Yeah, this happened

Those were big opportunities to show that they simply wanted to repair the country from it’s economic sluggishness, dismissive political attitudes to rural Americans, etc etc. I mean, Trump did offer several solutions…it’s just practically all of them came from a book probably titled How To: Second Coming of the Third Reich, Special 14th edition with a teeny cover sticker that says “Now with 88% more hate! Ruin your country beyond repair or your money back! See inside for details”. Meaning: none of these solutions actually work. The only thing the Final Solution did the last time was give Germany a huge luggage crate full of baggage to cart about, because the first thing that comes to anyone’s mind about Germanic history is mainly the terrible stuff they did in the ’30s and ’40s. More like a final solution for murdering a good reputation, if anything. Going Nazi wasn’t a great payoff to them, just like it won’t be for us.

I, nor anyone who have been historically affected by messages of hate and mass disparagement, should give anyone a chance if that’s pretty much all they’ve came out the gate with. I even tried to research Trump’s stances on actual issues during the election season, and about all I got that was pretty solid was “I don’t know…but we will just pour in a chunk of hate and see where that gets us.” That’s basically it: build a wall, get rid of non-Whites and more police. This is not a solution to anything. It’s just a recipe to make America not “Great” again but to make America White again. And Trump’s people have actually said that, word for word: That they believe America should be White only and White succeeding, that they hate anyone not Christian, not White and not Male. They’ve done openly displayed sieg heils at Alt-Right/Neo-Nazis gatherings.

Yeah, this happened, too

Yeah, this happened, too

Give this a chance? For what? It’s been shown countless times in even the past one hundred years that just giving hate a chance doesn’t magically transform into peace, it just becomes more virulent hatred that’s just been given a head start. Granted, no one not on the business end of that would definitely say, “Let’s give them a chance.” Since they have nothing to lose, the idea of fighting or being actively despondent or even cracking someone’s elbow in the middle of their Nazi salute seems “violent” and “not how peace works”. Because Americans always have politely asked for things like rights and country and politely discussed things over. Totes exactly what we did with the British and the Native Americans**. We’re such a peaceful nation, we don’t even have mass shootings.

Unfortunately, this is not reality. My family members don’t remember our ancestors being able to walk up to the Overseer or Master and say, “Hey, I’ve already put in my eight hours so I’m heading out. I’ve even kept track of it on this here scrap of paper – oh! and we’re running low on ink, I like the iron blue one from that guy down the street, it’s really nice and last for pages – See? That’s 40 hours, I took an hour off for lunch and everything. Also, it’s, like, super hot in the middle of the day and you made us work…that’s not cool, you always do that. Everyone around here thinks you better shape up or we’re leaving. Especially since you don’t pay us…which, I’m preeeeeeeeeeeetty sure is illegal. Like, super illegal. And I cut myself on a sickle, where’s my employee healthcare? One of my friends a few rows over heard over in Korea, they have a king named Sejong and he – a king, mind you – put in stuff like maternity leave. We should try some of that, or we’re leaving for good! You can find some new pickers and they’ll say the same. What say you?”

Yeaaaaaaaaaah, that’s not what would have happened. Would have been nice but very much didn’t happen. Instead, slave rebellions happened. Fighting happened. Dying happened (by the payload). Lynchings happened. Escapes happened. Suicides happened. Talking is great for some things but not when the person you’re talking to doesn’t even think you’re human. Even Schindler didn’t say to his fellow Nazis, “Hey, about this ‘kill all Jews’ thing. Ever wonder how this will help our country – like, actually help Germany? I mean, I’m just saying! Just saying. Y’know, for kicks and giggles, think about it. I mean, this is a lot of work to murder useful people like doctors and teachers. Just seems a bit dumb – I’m just saying, though! Just saying. I mean, we even killed a gay carpenter and we’ve had a crappy chair and tilting table for weeks. No carpenter, but we stick with the sh*tty table. Yes, Aust handles carpentry but, c’mon, everyone knows he’s bad at it, that’s how we got the table. We had a master carpenter and just killed him. Does that scream ‘smart’ to you? Think about it.” That would have been nice, imagining Schindler doing thoughtful roundtables with fellow Nazis at night, even with a rabbi present, because representation. But that’s not what happened. You can’t talk people out of hate so easily. That would be totally awesome but, as shown by history, totally not realistic.

Hoping that the current batch of fascist douchebags are going to be somehow different and totally open to conversation is intensely delusional. And increasingly so with each and every new pick Trump makes for cabinet. Even the minorities (the extreme, token few) he eyes are poster definitions of “internalized racism”. Everyone in Trump’s camp plans to roll back the clock like mad. And that makes Americans such as myself very, very concerned. Because I’m Pagan, I’m Black, I’m female, I was raised poor and in the inner city and, frankly, this is not my flag:

This would be better used as kindling, not as a method to run a nation.

This would be better used as kindling, not as a method to run a nation.

We are too diverse for this bullsh*t. But frankly, not everyone feels this way. Especially those who felt “othered” when mentions of diversity are said. Even those who swear up and down they’re allies but are actually in it for the saviorism. Even those who say they don’t see color but get offended when a Person of Color gets ahead in real life or even introduced in a comic book, sputtering, “We’re all one race, the human race. Why is Spiderman Black? Like, isn’t that racist? Why can’t he be White? He has to be White!” Even those who reblogs the #noDAPL Water Protectors on Tumblr and goes to the tribal land – not because clean water means anything to them but because they want to have a winter Coachella, complete with disruptive drum circles and asking Natives insanely dumb questions like “What’s my indian name?” instead of “Where do I put the crate of Milk of Magnesia and portable heaters?” Apparently, to those folks, we’re just too diverse a country that doesn’t benefit them, period. And now they want everyone to give Trump a chance since Hillary Clinton didn’t get in. (Is Clinton perfect? Heck no. Just isn’t that level of hateful) That maybe everything will be all right with the Alt Right, if given the opportunity. Just like it was all right during the ’40s when Japanese Americans had to go to Manzanar, USA. Or when anyone Jewish, Black, disabled, whatever, had to go to the death camps (the holocaust killed more than Jews, remember that. The first to go were political opponents, actually. Germany was a diverse nation, too. Just like now). What absolute insanity.

Even media that tilts intensely liberal like Mother Jones, CNN and MSNBC now falls over itself in trying to romanticize the Alt Right and distance them from the Neo-Nazi rhetoric they constantly spew, even the triple parentheses that they use to signify anyone who is Jewish or “Anti-White”. Simply because hatred got a makeover, it’s time to play nice with them. That’s ridiculous. And these are some of the same folks who won’t shy from saying “Feminazi” or “Grammar Nazi” (even joke about the Soup Nazi from Seinfield!) but have a hard time calling an actual Nazi a “Nazi”. Or “White Nationalist”. Even if the bigot does the salute and all! What is needed? The Hugo Boss uniform, heel clicking and goose stepping?

I don’t think anyone needs a chance to get to that point. That’s much too far.

 

* Sieg Heils: The hand/arm motion that Hitler is commonly associated with. The Nazi salute

** We told the British where to shove their tea and massacred Natives (even now, American police are trying to literally freeze out (water cannons and everything) the Sioux over the tribe wanting to defend clean water. By the way, Flint, MI is still happening)

Yep, first post back and I’m down with a headcold. Been fighting a head cold all this week. However, even without a headcold, this week still sucked for a lot of folks. Trump won the election. The part that sucked the most for me is that I called it.

When folks would ask me who I thought would win, I would respond, “Unfortunately, I think it might be Trump. The country has gone too left so we’re due for a conservative snap – which this gump-faced, fake-haired cheeto is part of. In addition, he’s a great salesperson, he could sell water to a fish, it just would unfortunately be clear blue gel. In terms of dupin’ the stupid, he’s good at that. And Americans aren’t known to be the smartest people in the world. Far from it.”

I’m an Independent (meaning I am not part of any party, they all suck) and I identify as a socialist (meaning I strongly believe that institutions like healthcare, education and social/fiscal safety nets should not be for just the rich and wealthy but for everyone). But also as a Black, female, Pagan person, I was kinda looking forward to basking in all the folks who were going to say how wrong I was.

 

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So wrong, so nice

 

Instead, this was me when I checked Google for the Electoral vote count:

 

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You can’t be serious

The US has really elected a moron that is very much planning to be a grade-A fascist. Of course, only White folks (also known as, “the voter bloc that mainly voted Trump in”), don’t see how Trump could bring a lot of bad news to a lot of people. Granted, this is the same group that said tried to say racism was over when Obama was elected…then voted in Trump based on his super racist platform.

There are already protests against Trump winning because, frankly, folks who aren’t White, straight, etc. are pretty concerned. It isn’t that Hillary would have been the daughter of God superceding Obama in everything he’s ever done, but at least folks who generally are targeted by the Ku Klux Klan would have not been as worried. She would have screwed up the nation as well but without the potential reality of political camps and a major spike in hate crimes. Instead, a sexist, racist rapist got elected and will be taking all those disparaging beliefs (and near 100 of lawsuits, let’s hope one of them will get him impeached) to the oval office with him. If it were some other Republican besides Trump, I’d probably be ok. Buuuuuut it’s not.

In addition to protests, there are also folks online who want to assemble for future protests and disruptions using encrypted networks and short range communications, such as Tor and Signal. I wouldn’t recommend this because Tor, for example, was made by the government (no, really, it was) and Signal can be intercepted. It’s really difficult to find a good network to assemble and help folks organize but, trust, they exist.

This is a very unfortunate election. It was a long time coming but that doesn’t change how terrible things are about to be. I expect a lot of civil right laws getting rolled back extensively. We’re a nation that has put whole groups of people into camps and prisons out of fear, disdain and/or hate (why people think these things can’t happen is beyond me). There’s actually no telling what will happen with this upcoming presidency. I definitely know Trump has a vendetta list and media folks (just the ones that depicted him honestly, or as he considers it, “badly”) are very close to the top. And given how Bush was during 9/11, it’s not hard to imagine limitations to freedoms of the press because that’s exactly what happened.

If you’re going to protest, that’s fine and dandy. The more important thing you can do is inform yourself about government, how it works, how it doesn’t work and what you actually want to solve because simply getting Trump out won’t solve all the emotions and feelings that got him elected in the first place. Nor the problems that people thought the current administration ignored or were too slow to fix. He didn’t get elected in a vaccuum.

Firstly, sorry I was away for a while, I had EEOC and police/Internal Affairs stuff to attend to.

Now onward with the post!

Throughout Black culture, there is the idea of “Black Love”, which is very pure in concept: Two Black people in a gentle, calm and strong relationship that features a strong Black man that takes the helm of everything, is the protector and provider of the home, and a strong and intensely supportive Black woman who is always behind him, taking care of all home business: rearing the children, keeping the home non-chaotic and making sure that any drama is quickly vanquished.

This belief is very common in pro-Black circles as an aspiration of what to attain, it’s also common in general mainstream Black culture as an ideal relationship for Black men and women. The idea bores from the belief that “no one else likes us or cares about us so we may as well support each other”, a rejection of universal anti-Blackness. This is a great idea but it’s exactly that: not reality. It’s also warped and modified primarily as a purport for Black masculinity since it is rarely, if ever, non-hetero in its depictions and does not really allow women to have much agency. That and it’s basically the 1950’s American nuclear family ideal painted black and a little ankh hung somewhere for decoration.

On its face, the concept of “Black love” is a very beautiful one. It’s smiling Black couples on the cover of countless Black magazines, usually the woman holding a baby or the couple talking about children. They’re financially well off, they have a home, a car and a world of their own. They could make a White person on the street gag in absolute horror and switch from Sanders and Hillary to Trump in a heartbeat just by walking down the street, hand-in-hand and joyful. They’re an active and passive defiance of many dehumanizing anti-Black stereotypes and offensive to any and many who believe those stereotypes.

But in practice, it’s a very complicated and very hard to exemplify concept that is filled with more problems than beauty. And it’s no hidden secret, countless books have been penned on this subject, especially from the womanist and Black queer perspective.

“True” Black Love does not leave much room for Black women to be individualistic people. It shows stark similarities to 19th century Victorian beliefs of a woman’s place to be an “angel in the house”: The cultural idea to not pursue “masculine” things like heavy careers and individuality because it’s her job to make a “man feel like a man” – as if the man is absolutely incapable of normal human feelings and developing mental and emotional securities by themselves due to (entirely fictitious and scientifically bogus) biological beliefs. If the man left or cheated on the woman, the accusations usually hover around how she wasn’t emotionally supportive or simply caused too much trouble with her own life happenings and therefore, it made perfect sense the dude is going to run off to the next chick that can take care of him like a mother (that gives blowjobs).

The woman desiring a career can be seen as a threat to the “Black Love” relationship – unless it can directly or indirectly benefit the man somehow via paying his bills, giving him supplemental income, basically supporting him instead of a 50/50 relationship. This happens a lot in Black relationships – not in every, of course, but enough to be a well-known concept all on its own. The goal of the woman in “Black Love” is supposed to be that of “Support Black man, have kids, basically be a Black June Cleaver”. If the man cheats, she’s supposed to welcome him back as the angel in the house and get mad only at the woman (or “women”) he cheated on her with for pulling him from pious, Abrahamic monogamy down the deep road of lust. If the man is not there for her emotionally, she is supposed to be okay with that because he’s a man and thus has more important matters to attend to than how his partner feels because it will support the whole somehow – even if it doesn’t help or support her personally, emotionally or mentally. Because women issues never matter and Black women are supposed to be made of spun steel, not capable of vulnerabilities. A “Real” Black woman in a “True” Black Love relationship is supposed to hold her man down: keep his secrets, put up with his many, many, many flaws and be grateful that she has a Black man to have and to hold. She’s the evolved version of the “Ride or Die” chick. And she is depressed, unloved and insecure – but told to always be a giver and never a taker because the Black man already has enough strife due to systemic oppression.

“True” Black Love somehow holds no room for non-hetero relationships. Actually, the opposite. Lesbian “True” Black Love relationships seems mythical and gay “True” Black Love seems to be a mockery on the concept altogether because of the conjunct of homophobic and misogynist beliefs. Monogamy is seen as a must in “True” Black Love, there’s is no room for polyamory, (unless cheating and only if the guy does it because he’s “just being a man”). It appears to be also a must that the expression of “True” Black Love can only be between a man and a woman because it is a copy of the White American nuclear family of the 1950s…which actually makes sense given that the concept was newly crafted in the Pro-Black movements of the ’60s and 70s. There doesn’t even seem to be room for bi-people. Either you’re straight as a rod or you’re not Black.

Long story short, it seems the rigid idea of “Black Love” is more of a myth than an actual experience. Does it mean that Black Love doesn’t exist? No. Not at all. There are plenty of successful Black relationships all over the world that doesn’t dissolve into dysfunction and tragedy. Plenty of Black couples who never cheat on each other, plenty of Black couples who equally work together as a duo and not as a lopsided partnership, plenty of Black couples of various gender pairings that are making it work. Because they’re a couple. And that’s what couples do to make a relationship work. They’re not perfect – like the people in the relationships – but they’re making it work…because it’s worthwhile.

Relationships should be worthwhile and healthy. It is unhealthy to be a Black person in a relationship with another Black person and sticking it through because you don’t want to show society yet another failed Black family/relationship. While the effort is truly valiant, it’s ultimately worthless because instead it’s just the person with the ideal getting hurt. It’s basically like continually hitting your head against a brick wall in front of a passing crowd because you want to prove that bone is actually quite strong with sufficient calcium. Some will note, most won’t and you’re still going to have the random dink in the crowd going, “I dunno, I’m gonna believe that Facebook post about how I can get all my nutrients from the sun.” In the end, you’re just going to have a gnarly headache and not much to show for it. The ideal of “True” Black Love is no reason to be with someone who cheats, is emotionally vacant or otherwise disrespectful because, frankly, that’s not love at all. That’s being conditioned to accept abuse as normalcy hidden under the super thin veneer of “Pro-Blackness”. It’s not love at all if someone doesn’t respect you as a person or keeps coming up with excuses, temper tantrums or trying to control you as part of a relationship.

There’s a justifiable reason why there is pressure to want to have a Black Love relationship but it’s all pointless if you’re with someone that doesn’t suit you. I’ve seen this more with Black women than I have seen this with Black men. Countless times I’ve read and been told of cheatings, beatings and emotional abjectivity. And pretty much all of them stayed because “He’s just being a man” or “I have to support my king” or “I don’t want another Black relationship to fail”. Basically, they all were brought up in the ideals of “True” Black Love and pretty much suffered for it. When the dude would get called out, of course, here came the “I’m sorry”, “I need to be a better man” and other lukewarm fibs just to keep the woman around. That’s unacceptable and unjustifiable, completely.

It should take more than “they have the same skintone as me” as a reason to stay. Yes, actual Black love is very important because there’s enough anti-Blackness to drown a ship, but using a hyper-idealistic version suits no one better at all. Instead of aspiring for “true” Black love, just aspire for a very healthy relationship between two Black people. There is no reason to use a relationship to express a point or idea, just enjoy the other person’s presence the best you can. When two Black folks who love each other genuinely and are best friends with each other, that should be the “True” Black Love ideal.

Welp, in the recent string of “Police + Black people = ends poorly”, this time a therapist was shot. Not killed, thankfully, just shot. He was trying to calm an escaped adult with autism, who only had a toy truck. A neighbor confused a tonka truck for a gun (it’s amazing how being not White can magically turn even the most innocent of things into guns, like bright green soda bottles and toy trucks) and in came the cops to go after an autistic person because, y’know, police are very well trained for neurodivergent people, especially non-White ones.* The mental health worker, doing their job, was just trying to keep the 23-year-old safe and not dead as he’s dealing with the sensory overload of very dumb people with really powerful weapons acting immensely aggressive because…there’s not enough bad PR for police already? And he gets shot. On ground, hands out, responding carefully, still gets a spontaneous injection of lead vitamins.

Now, if that’s not baffling, the head of the police union has more to wow you with: they didn’t mean to shoot the therapist…they were aiming for the autistic person.

Oh, that’s fantastic to know. Just wonderful. No need for Mental Health First Aid classes when Smith & Wesson can already give you a crash course in how to deal with the mentally ill and disabled. No need for the Hellen Keller method of dealing with neurodivergents when there’s the George Zimmerman solution. I would bemoan how Florida is really turning out to be a crappy state buuuuuuuut the whole nation is getting sour.

This is very frustrating for a ream of reasons:

The person is autistic, not dangerous:
Ok, I understand there’s a bunch of stigma around having autism. Then you have folks like Autism Speaks** who make things worse. The interesting thing about the internet is that you can learn about autism (not that vaccines cause it because that’s been disproven over and over and over again). There’s even an episode of the children’s show Arthur about it:

There, now you know more about autism than a police officer. And if you’re a police officer, now you just got a little bit better at your job, you deserve a popsicle as you get ready to strut into work to impress your major and be one less person for Internal Affairs to worry about.

Apparently what caused the cop to get antsy is that the autistic person was not obeying orders to lay down on the ground. Because he’s autistic. Like the mental health worker was saying. And completely harmless. This is such bad training, oh my gods.

The cop being not White doesn’t make it better:
The cop that delivered the shot was a 30 year old Latin dude that was kind of new, only four years on the force. But still, he should have gotten much better training than breaking out the automatic rifle and taking three shots. I understand police feel under attack because they don’t tend to train their brethern well and that can attract controversy. However, I really doubt attempting to murder an autistic person is going to make anything better. Neither is trying to kill that person’s doctor. If there were beanbags pellets instead of bullets or, I don’t know, listening to the doctor, this could have probably not even have turned into a story. Just a case of a patient got out, doctor went to get them, police came, understood the situation and tried to help the doctor rally the person in. Hey, that even would have been an okay story, to show that not all police are pigs with bloodthirst. Instead, you just get a new story of why police get so much heat about how they handle things.

This is a wee bit personal:
Ah, for someone who isn’t very anti-police, these stories (and my own personal experience, such as a police raid) do not help me keep the faith much. I have written on here a number of times about how I have trauma disorders and I have a therapist as well. And I have to get treatment for my disability, that, if left untreated, can easily go ham. This really irks me that if I have a major episode, this is what I get to look forward to: some dunce person that can’t tell a tonka truck from a glock calling 911 and police just getting murder-y in response. My main therapist is White buuuuuut the mental health worker that helped defined my disorder back when I was hospitalized? Black. And given how this story unraveled, it doesn’t even matter what race my main therapist is, they’re just as much of a target simply because I’m in the vicinity.

I have friends in the force going up to Federal. I explain to them how my disorder works and they ask questions, because that’s the smart thing to do. However, they should already know how to deal with mentally ill and disabled people because they’re who gets called when someone is having an episode. This is not good. This is alarming. The answer to dealing with neurodivergent people is not “Just add bullets”.

The police, frankly, handled this poorly. This is getting beyond annoying, this is getting concerning. Police generally are trained with protocols of how to handle everything, from irate sports fans to riots. They need to really upgrade how they handle dealing with people in general, it seems. Especially the historically marginalized.

 

*They’re not. “Attempt to murder” is not a satisfactory method to deal with neurodivergent people. Ever.

** “Autism$peaks” because the money is all they’re after

I’m so tired of hearing about Dr. King – wait, scratch that. I’m tired of people quoting Dr. King. Usually in tragedies. Usually by bigots. Usually for super shallow reasons. And it’s the same three or four quotations everywhere. Basically, this is how I feel:

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Actually, I got so sick of hearing people quote Dr. King (a civil rights leader the average person know jack-all about, especially if they’re White) that I actually looked up his last words when he was shot on April 4th, 1968 roughly through the throat by a bullet from Remington 760 Gamemaster rifle. Why? I’m morbid and annoyed. (And for cross-burners that trip over this blog, that gun has been out of commission since 1981. Maybe you shouldn’t try to murder people because they want rights). This is what King said:

“Ben, make sure you play ‘Take My Hand, Precious Lord’ in the meeting tonight. Play it real pretty.”

“Ben” was Ben Branch, a jazz bandleader that was supposed to play that night at an event. Seems like King was a pretty passionate guy, which is pretty obvious. Maybe he thought he was going to pull through, this was only the second or third near-successful attempt on his life. The first, I believe was being stabbed with a letter opener pretty close to the heart.

The reason why I am talking all these gruesome details? Because it’s a pretty strong reminder that the dude is dead. He didn’t die a pretty death where he just passes away in his sleep. He isn’t tucked away in the hills somewhere, swaying away on a creaky rocking chair humming old hymns and Negro spirituals his mom taught him. Nope, shot through the throat on a second story balcony because, just like now, not everyone jives well with the concept of Black lives mattering, regardless whether it is called “Abolitionism” or “Civil Rights Movement” or “Black Lives Matter”. And just like now, bigoted folks back then (they had no one Black to quote so they probably went with the Bible), said nonsense that made it sound like racism is this magical, abominable creature that pops out of a vortex, harms people and dips fast before anyone can take a picture. You know, that hate isn’t done by people like them.

Part of why I’m irate is:

Can you please cite someone else?
Look, I get it, the average non-Black person knows next to nothing about Black history because hey, Black lives don’t matter. That’s their story and they’re sticking to it, quite obviously. Even when they pretend that they don’t. Even Black folks are not always up on the facts about Black history, which also sucks.

Despite everyone consistently interacting with a device that has revolutionized information dispensing since the creation of moveable type (*cough*the internet*cough*), it really seems like there’s only one person to cite. I mean, at least cite some Malcom X or Ella Baker! Either way, now would be an awesome time to look up who actually participated in the Civil Rights Movements (White folks, don’t look for the White people in the Civil Rights movement, they were mainly the folks that were being the cause why folks had to march and get shot in the throat standing on a balcony motel. Or murder nine people in a historically Black church – wait, that was recent. Bombing churches, shooting churches, it’s hard to tell repetitive hate crimes apart). Just look for other people besides King to quote. The upside is, you’ll finally fully understand why Black folks have a tendency to march in the street over rights and how this is very much not a new problem. From letters from anonymous people telling King and crew that they’re fakers, that Black people have it great here, that they need to go back to Africa, that all their marches show how Black people don’t deserve to have rights (reminder: these letters are usually from Americans. Who like celebrating the 4th of July. Which is from the Revolutionary Wa- nevermind, Americans have to earn the “moron” stereotype somehow). Basically, it was just the pen-and-paper version of all these wonderful things that you and anyone else can find on literally any social media platform today. None of it is new, just digital.

If you’re gonna cite King, please research who he is or what he did
You know the totes radical thing about technology and the internet today? You can totally find recorded speeches and videos and stuff on sites as mainstream as YouTube. Talk about amazing. Like, you can hear how King felt about White liberals (Basically along the lines of “Don’t trust them, they’re nice folks, until you figure out that they’ll say the horrible stuff behind your back instead of to your face, unlike conservatives,” riots (Basically: “This is what happens when folks get oppressed for a long time and never heard. Lolz. Saw that coming.”) and other things. I’m sure he had something to say about shooting Black folks, I mean, he had something to say about napalm and why that was bad. I’m sure he’d have more to say about guns but y’know, he got shot down by one. *

King is used commonly to lowkey tell Black people “Stop showing us that racism still exists and is bad”
How come no one cites King when things are not popping off? Seriously, he’s very quotable even about things that have not much or anything to do with murdering Black people practically for sport. Instead of saying “I don’t like how you march about and make me feel like I’m racist,” White folks like to reference King like he’s a) the Moses of Black people and we automatically will listen to him instead of have individual thoughts and ideas b) as if he was pro-peace because he wanted to appeal to White people strictly and he didn’t condone violence because he didn’t want White people hurt in effort to get rights for Black people c) because they think  racism died back in 1968 and that Black folks just like stirring the pot, just like how when White folks saw King back then, they thought racism died back in 1865 and that Black folks just like stirring the pot.

Long and short end of it, it’s a silencing tactic. The point of quoting King is to make some random Black person say “Dang, you’re right. King didn’t get shot in the throat by a government-backed White supremacist for being pro-Black for me to sit here and still complain that I still have no rights. I’ll go back to my dead-end job and continue making  lattes and kale chips for White people, I should have known better. If King weren’t brutally murdered by racism, he would be so disappointed in me marching and not the fact that you are oppressive.” Which isn’t happening. Because it’s not true. King wouldn’t be a big fan of riots but just like when he was alive, he wouldn’t shame the rioters, just the people and systems that caused it (which, by the by, wasn’t the rioters). Even King sat down with Malcom X, who was the opposite side of the same coin, and the both agreed that while they were coming at the solution in two different ways, they basically had the same goal: defeat anti-Blackness, obtain Civil Rights, stuff like that. And the meeting of the minds was so iconic, it’s still reverberates through media today: Charles Xavier and Magneto in the X-Men series.**

Because it’s used as a silencing tactic, it paints an “I’m Racist” neon sign above the person’s head. Or just plain “I’m anti-Black” since everyone of all shades use Dr. King to keep Black folks quiet about oppression. Seriously, not cool. If you’re really against racism and don’t like Black folks marching in the street as a result of it, go cite, I don’t know, Jesus or something to White people to let them know that hate, even hidden kinds, are not cool. Black people already know what King said. And the fact he was murdered for it.

“Segregation Now, Intergration Never”/”All Lives Matter”
I remember when my mom told me about when my high school, Baltimore City College High School, was officially de-segregated back in the 50s. What started that conversation was when I asked mom why she didn’t go to City, one of the best high school Baltimore could offer (we’re talking “golden ticket out of the hood” here) and went to Forest Park instead, a pretty ok school but not the best. She told me that it was strictly because of segregation (segregation still was happening in the 60s and 70s, including gender segregation***), and thus started the convo. When City integrated racially, you can believe there were signs saying “Segregation Now, Integration Never”, which was the motto back then against the Civil Rights movement. There was also the National Guard, waiting for things to pop off from the pro-segregation protesters. Actually, before I continue, I just want to say that while City’s integration was relatively more “peaceful” than other Baltimore schools, don’t think it went smoothly. It was “peaceful” because the military showed up. With guns. That’s not exactly peaceful, that’s tense. I should know, I was around when the Baltimore riots happened. You’re miles from peaceful when the military shows up.

Moving on, the grandchildren and children of the “Segregation Now, Integration Never” crowd are just saying “All Lives Matter” now. Same meaning, just new upgrade. Back then, White people against anti-racism thought that America was fine the way it was and that integration would introduce problems where there weren’t any. Kinda like now, when “All Lives Matter” activists say that focusing only on Black lives mattering would introduce problems where, according to them, there weren’t any.

It’s amazing the speed and gusto “All Lives Matter” types will cite King, a person who they are fundamentally against, because they think Black people are so stupid, that referencing King will be a calming dog whistle to us. It isn’t.

 

To sum everything up, the King is dead and he was shot plain dead by the very system he tried to unravel. Not so some Bernie Sander-leaning yuppie can cite him. Not so some Trump-voting plebeian can cite him. So that Black folks wouldn’t have to usher in a new civil rights movement. But here we are, and even King would agree: Black Lives Matter.

How do we know? Because that’s literally all he ever fought for. And was gunned down cold for.

All Lives Matter, amirite?

All Lives Matter, amirite? Or nah?

 

*Don’t like that I’m not direct quoting? Too bad. Looks like you’re going to have to Google it, bro. It’s almost like I’m pro-education or anti-stupid or something. Make America Smart Again?

** If you think this fact is false, please turn in your “nerd” card to be shredded and torched. We don’t need fake geeks running about, you guys already buy up the Comic Con tickets just to harass people and overload the rooms. Go watch football or something

*** This also excludes the fact that even the mayor and former commissioner of Baltimore have admitted that Baltimore still runs on 1950’s-era racism, just on “Jim Crow Lite”. Gender problems? Never left.

Driving me up a wall

EEOC update: Alright, I haven’t really talked too much about my situation about dealing with my case. It almost looked like I returned to normal. Still, Baltimore City Police’s Internal Affairs is still currently investigating the police officer that decided to raid and trash my apartment.

That is really all. Can’t really say more than that because, well, lawyer. Onward with the post.


Firstly, thank you everyone who participated in the Black Witch 6th Anniversary livestream yesterday. I apologize for being so hare-brained, I never really know what to say live. I will also try to get better about promoting these livestreams because so far (aside from my battery dying or the connection being crap, which are both my phone’s problem), I definitely want to do more of these. I really like the fact that now I can get more use out of my Black Witch Fan Page on Facebook and that I no longer have to fight with Ustream or the like. Hooray.

Due to my horrific situation with my transmission dying and the $5000+ bill that needed to be paid and the fact that to pay it, I can’t get my usual treatment for my trauma disorders (also known as, “the thing that keeps me stable”), I have been looking around for replacement cars because sooner or later, that will have to happen. Eventually, I stumbled onto electric cars. I think they’re pretty cool and the lot I know about them was basically:

1) Tesla

2) Yuppies (also known as “non-Tesla” cars)

Annnnnd that’s it. So, I researched because that’s what I do. I’ve always liked the Kia Soul so I pretty much hovered around that car as an example because I rather look into cars that a normal person can afford, not cars that should be parked next to Bugatti. Kia Soul came out with the Kia Soul EV (“EV” means “Electric Vehicle”) back in 2015. This is what I discovered from researching electric car questions (“What is the transmission?”, “What is the gauge of travel fuel? Charges? Watts?”, “How long can a car go sitting and uncharged? Will it die like a smartphone?” etc, etc):

I discovered a stark reminder of why I hate the Green movement and how pretentious it is.

Y’see, it appears the biggest reason I’m tripping across on countless blogs and forums about electric cars is some version of “I want to save the environment, I’m better than those fossil-fuel cars.” Like, it is major. I honestly am a bit surprised that every purchase of an electric car that isn’t a Tesla doesn’t come with a coupon book for Whole Foods and Birkenstocks. The pretentiousness of the commenters, bloggers and forum-users reminded me of the mid-2000s when the “Green Revolution” got its first bearings, from BP switching their logo to the flowery one during Live Earth (then had an oil spill on the gulf coast they tried to squirm out of), to the onslaught of delusional yuppies who thought they could solve all the world of its ills if everyone sold their cars, bought expensive fixie bikes, put solar panels on their homes and other extremely short-sighted ideas. And how if anyone doesn’t participate, they somehow want to murder the earth, it doesn’t matter if that person can’t buy organic food and Fair Trade.

One thing I disliked about the Green movement because it was constructed in a pretty prejudiced manner (racism, classism, ableism) and was less about saving the forest and more about middle class White people who just want to fling their money around in effort to look better than everyone else. Seriously, they don’t even know if what they’re doing actually is doing anything to help the earth (because if people were serious about this, they would note that it’s corporations that should be bearing the majority of responsibility and there’s no amount of “fine, we won’t buy from them” that will fix things) but maaaaaaaaaan do they have a stick up their derrieres about it as if they’re better. Especially to people who can’t spend thousands of dollars on whimsies.

I’m certain readers (mainly White ones) are going, “How is caring about the earth racist, classist and ableism? Aren’t we are all one race, the human race?” because they tend to question that a lot. And usually follow up with, “Don’t you care about the earth?”

Dude, I’m Pagan. This means I care about the environment as a standard basis of my religious beliefs…but I’m not dumb either. I was raised in the inner city so I take on environmentalism from a more realistic and humanistic approach. Y’know, eradication of food deserts, sustainable (and affordable) housing and sustainable employment, basic stuff like that. Notice I never said, “reduce carbon footprint by getting an electric car” or “eat more quinoa”. And let me break it down why the “Green Revolution” isn’t as shiny and wonderful as it sounds.

Racism: Dude, look at the advertising for anything Green living or sustainability. It’s overly White. No diversity to be seen for miles. And if there is diversity, it’s usually under a “white saviorist” context. We’re usually depicted as poor migrant workers, villages filled with poor – but happy – people. Basically, the only time diversity really shows up is with the undertone of “Do {phony environmentalist act} and you’re helping this miserable bastard. White man’s burden, saving the world. They can’t do it themselves, too primitive to even know that plastic exists.”

This doesn’t even include the micro-aggression towards Black people want to be involved as “oh, you’re a credit to your race” or “isn’t this a bit pricy for you?” Buying sustainably is definitely not buying cheap and with the stereotype of “Black = poor”, that means a lot of irritation if you’re Black and you want to just do your thing, even if it is just wanting to maintain a small garden. This leads to the next point…

Classism: If sustainability cravers were actually serious about helping the world, they wouldn’t make the options to go green be so pricy. I mean, why not put solar panels on schools and projects in the hood? How about allowing low-income people getting an actual leg up to get an electric car because a) this puts less gas cars on the road and b) it creates an access for people to find decent work and be able to manage their lives a little better? How about not only community gardens but also allow people in the community to maintain a small grocery store that actually hires people from the community and etc etc etc? That way, there’s an economy and access to organic food. It’s not $6 asparagus water but hey, it puts nutrients in hungry and hard-worked bodies. There’s no sign of the “Green Revolution” in poorer areas because it’s just a game for the upper classes, not an actual effort to make the world better. If it, the “revolution”, cannot benefit those who need it most, then it’s not a revolution because no one of value is being helped. It’s not fair to not be able to purchase the more expensive filters for water, the nicer cars instead of the 1980s and 1990s clunkers we’re forced to stay with, to not have access to sustainable foods or jobs to provide money to buy them with…and to get shamed and ragged all the same about it.

Ableism: One thing I noticed, Green Living folks tend to be very able-bodied…and assume that if they recycle and have a paleo diet, somehow people who are disabled brought it on themselves. That if someone drank more organic smoothies, they would be able to get out of that wheelchair. If they just had a garden, they would somehow be cured of bipolar and depression. (Mental institutions have been making the mentally ill doing field work since at least the Victorian times – hasn’t worked then, not going to work now.) These people, those who tend to be hyper-focused on Green Living, tend to not operate within the basic realms of science and biology. Having a disorder or disease or any condition will not magically go away because someone had free range goat cheese and wild, raw turnips. That’s not how illness works. Does eating better and having access to better food and water improve health? Absolutely! Is it the cure-all of any human ailment, physical or mental? Absolutely not. Because health doesn’t work that way.

How annoying. All I wanted to do was look at cars and the capabilities of vehicles, instead I have to wade through the briar patch of self-absorbed douchebags.

Next week is The Arts! No word yet on who to feature but it shall be a thing! However, if you have something artistic that you want to share, feel free to drop me a line!

So, Who’s Winning?

EEOC Update: Turns out I still have to run donations! Ugh, yay being broke. I simply have to extend donations to the rest of this month. Why? Well, remember when I mentioned that my car’s transmission gave up on life? Well, repairs are going to be $5400. And hooray, I have a new gig… that needs a car to get to. So as I suffer with Maryland transit, please do donate. I will streamline this strictly for Paypal for ease of donation and telling folks to donate. Donate here.

If anything, I’ve really just been focusing on the US primary to kinda pass the time. Yep, I’m so deeply screwed and traumatized from my experience that I am literally focusing on the race to the White House for mental stimulation/relaxation. Or watching endless cat videos. Because my brain feels absolutely friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiied, like, Southern-deep-fryer-at-a-carnival friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiied. Hence, why I pay attention to raw data and kitties.

This would be the third election I would be able to participate in. I remember during the last election, I was working at the Library of Congress, which was really interesting. Because, frankly, your vote actually does matter – that and I got cool stuff from “Congress Move Out Day” for those who didn’t get reelected. Huzzah.

Oi, the current pass of elections is something outrageous. Usually, every election year is a media circus but this year is quite uncanny. I’m actually an Independent (meaning, I think both parties suck) but all I have been doing is keeping track of primary numbers, because Primaries are a combination of a numbers game and popularity contest. I’m none too surprised that Trump is pretty much bagging the GOP nomination. Everyone from general news to the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) have pretty much said there’s a major uptic in hate rhetoric, hate group memberships and people being antsy about the subject in general. Trump ran for president back in 2000, didn’t do so well and simply decided to do so now again and simply up the “I hate everybody…except for ‘true Americans'” ante that Republicans tend to tout.

Usually, I would be try to be at least a teensy bit objective and factual about elections and things like that (I actually wrote a “Let’s Vote” column with all information) but alors, this is mental. The reason this is mental for me is the same reason why this is mental for anyone who isn’t White: the dude does have a Hitler-y likeness in his fevor. Now, I know, there’s the internet rule, the “Godwin law“, where if you talk about a subject long enough (and with enough White people around), eventually Hitler will be mentioned. However, with this current instance with history, I can certainly see the parallel. Working at the Library of Congress, I’ve had the chance to look at a lot of interesting documents that record some of the crappier parts of history. There is a lot of them…and it is indeed nightmare fuel. (I should talk about the day I had to deal with books talking about the illicit organ harvesting in China, the drawings from N. Korean detainees and other really horrible instances of humans being human someday.) This Trump character definitely suits the bill to the point you may want to ask him about watercolors.

I know there are probably people who are going, “Ehhhhh, everyone is considered evil when they’re running for president as a Republican,” but this time, it is different. This dude will make Bush W. look like a decent – but goofy – president. Bush still may not know how to say “nuclear” but at least he had his dad there to explain “it isn’t a toy, you can’t go waving it around like it’s a gun.” Trump just has his thin skin and thick ego. Baaaaaaaaaaaad combo, especially for the most stressful job in the US. You need tact, skill, due dilligence, and an IQ that’s not the equivallent to two bb’s in a tin can.

That and Trump is a Birther, a person who demanded President Obama fork over his birth certificate to prove that he’s an American…but is usually part of the party (GOP) that didn’t do the same to McCain (Panama) or harsh Cruz (Canada) about it. The thing about birthers is that, the core of their thinking is literally “Obama can’t be a US citizen because he’s Black. He has an African last name and an Arabic middle name. He must be Muslim and not American. Because Americans are White and Christian.” Seriously. And non-Black minorities/PoC thought that they were the only ones treated like outsiders in their own country. Newp. Basically, birthers are pretty racist people. Their thinking is powered by racism, their idea is borne from racism, they are racist themselves. They’re Klan-lite. And the head of Klan-lite has an actual shot at being the president.

If people are still going “Ehhhhh, ‘Klan-lite’ isn’t the same as ‘plain Klan’. Still a case of being Henny Penny,” either you’re not Black or you’re not aware of American history: The Klan are a terrorist group. As in, they’ve done bombings (including churches, usually American get emo when a church is attacked…unless it’s a Black church, then it’s excuses for days), they’ve thrown acid on Black Americans, strung Black Americans up trees (including Black Americans just returning from war and in their military uniforms), everything that kinda makes a group count as a “terrorist group”. There’s nothing terroristic the Klan hasn’t done. Buuuuut somehow the Taliban and Daesh/ISIS are scarier. Because Islam. To be anywhere on the Klan spectrum, especially in the eyes of a Black person, is bad. Very bad. Because eventually it blows into full-on hate and have that person be a president in a nation that’s still very much prejudiced and bigoted…it’s gonna be a problem. Like a problem that will involve camps. America has shoved its own citizens into camps before (Japanese Americans in the internment camps during WWII (and note, never were Germans or Italians rounded up)), there’s not really a whole lot to stop this from happening again. I mean, we already have a prison industrial complex and a lot of racialized feelings in regards to criminality in America. That’s actually a good chunk of what Trump is tapping into for votes, a successful tactic. Basically, Trump is scary because people will be disappearing. Muslim and brown folks started getting followed and shipped to gitmo right after 9/11 and that was Bush. Trump will go way worse.

Alright, enough about Trump and how he’s pretty bad news for anyone who isn’t White. Back to numbers!

As I previously mentioned eariler, I keep track of the numbers, not the hype, of who is doing well and who is not. I actually just type “primary results” into Google and I get a handy-dandy graph divided between Republican and Democrat parties. Just type it in yourself and see what you find. These numbers are very useful for me because otherwise I would get bewildered from all the media hype and I’m already bewildered enough. Sometimes I read articles but only if they’re fairly factual.

About articles, I always wondered why people thought Trump entering the race was a joke. There’s no reason why to say “He couldn’t be serious.” If someone wants to be president and they’re putting their hat in the ring with earnest, then it’s fine to take them seriously. Besides, American history is rife with walking jokes running for president, and a few who actually made it in. Ditto for any American political office. We’re not exactly the nation of frumpiness and intelligence. Besides, I doubt people who took Trump’s current run as a joke are laughing now.

That’s all the Black Witch for now! Sorry this was late, everyone. I spent all Thursday and Friday fighting with the mechanic over the bill and trying to get new job settled. My brain is completely full of static because I have so much on my plate. Please donate if you can!

Alrighty then, let’s talk about a subject that I don’t usually broach: hair. I don’t really care about it but as it has come up a lot in recent days, let’s get down to it and all its nonsense politics.

As of recent, Beyonce put out a visual album called “Lemonade”. It definitely seems the whole world wound up watching it. I usually don’t care for anything Beyonce since I grew up with Destiny’s Child, as well as countless other acts such as 702 and Total, therefore it’s all just background sounds but I definitely saw the artistic visuals (I’m a sucker for short films) so I gave it a go. I never thought people would hyperfocus on the phrase “better call Becky with the good hair”…but then again, I’m Black and I forgot that Beyonce has a multitude of White fans, who took this and ran with it like a Klansman with a people-hunting license.

Ok, if you’re White (mainly White girls) and you’re saying “I’m Becky with the good hair”, to a Black person’s ears, you just said, “Segregation now, intergration never. Trump for president. Why don’t Black people bleach their skin and straighten their hair if they want to be accepted? Ugh, dirty porch monkeys.”

No, seriously, all that in one teeny phrase. This is why blindly stealing cultural terminology, idioms and phrases are a bad idea.

If you’re thinking, “Beyonce said all this about herself! I thought she liked being Black!” She does. When a Black person talks about a “Becky with the good hair”, she’s saying: “I am culturally disrespected time and time again because my skin is dark, my hair is nappy. I’m forever devalued, regardless what I do because I have ‘bad’ hair. Everyone likes you more if you have that ‘good’, straight hair like White girls do. What bullsh*t.” It’s mainly racist when a White person says it, an expression of the existence of racism when a Black person says it, and I’ll be going into the why below.

Let’s break it down in two compartments: “Becky” and “Good Hair” because I think if you’re going to be a mentally dense White girl (a ‘Becky’), you may want to get it straight, especially if you’re the feminist type – doubly so if you have a Tumblr because frankly, this is really stupid.

“Becky”
We’re going to start here with some history. Actually, no, we’re going to start here with a reference from the extremely well-written column from Damon Young of Very Smart Brothas, titled “Where ‘Becky’ Comes From, and Why It’s Not Racist, Explained“:

“For years, ‘Becky’ has been used as a general reference for a particular type of White woman….It’s actually easier for me to say whether a White woman would be considered a Becky than it is to explain the criteria. Hillary Clinton? Not a Becky. Natalie Portman? Not really a Becky. Taylor Swift? The Beckiest. Iggy Azelea? Darth Becky. There are several theories on its etymology, but the one that makes the most sense is that it stems from the first line of ‘Baby Got Back.’

“Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt”

And cue to the video in reference! “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix ALot, everyone. Pay suuuuuuuuuuuper close attention to the intro.

In the intro, the unnamed girl is talking to her friend Becky and this is what she says:

“Oh. My. God. Becky, look at her butt. It is so big. She looks like one of those rap guys’ girlfriends. Who understands those rap guys, ugh? They only talk to her because she looks like a total prostitute, okay? I mean, her butt. It’s just so…big…ugh, I can’t believe it’s so round – it’s like, out there – I mean, ugh, gross. Look! She’s just so…Black.”

And then we go into the song that is worth its own race x gender deconstruction but here ya have it, the whole kit and kaboodle. This name, Becky, is what stuck. (I can already hear some apologist going, “technically, Becky never said any of that, so it isn’t her to blame so [blah blah blah bs]”, dude…no one cares. Also, it isn’t like Becky ever says, “Chill it, Sarah. She’s ok the way she is, gawd. You’re, like, so racist. No wonder Chad cheated on you at the Spring Formal.”) Now, this first line was an ear catcher then and, trust, it is now. Nicki Minaj sampled that exact line “Oh. My. God. Becky, look at her butt,” for her pop song “Anaconda”. Actually, I believe Sir Mix ALot added to it with the hook “My anaconda don’t/My anaconda don’t/My anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hon.”

This, in academia, is what you actually would call “cultural intertexuality”. It’s nifty and all over the place in hip hop…because it’s a creative art form, like any other art form.

Alright, back to the racist duo, featuring Jank and Silent Becky. This is what White girls unknowingly are refering to, time and time over when they’re referencing Beyonce in “Lemonade”. Not smart. Actually, Young references what a “Becky” stereotype is:

“Admittedly, referring to White women as “Becky” isn’t particularly nice, but it’s ultimately a reaction to a certain type of privileged young White woman who exists in a state of racial obliviousness that shifts from intentionally clueless to intentionally condescending. “

I agree. And if any White girl thinks “Becky” is a slur…uhhhhhh, and “Shaniqua/Pedro/Ping-Ping/Ahmed” isn’t? White folks have been dragging us by our names for centuries. The difference is, “Becky” can still get hired, “Shaniqua” has to work twice as hard to get half as much as “Becky”. If anything at all. “Becky” doesn’t make people talk down to you like “Shaniqua” does, even if you’re decorated with degrees. “Becky” doesn’t get the worst assume of her, “Shaniqua” is treated like a criminal from the start. “Becky” isn’t a slur because it’s literally just a name to the rest of society, no baggage. “Shaniqua” has the opposite effect. And if a White girl thinks “Becky” is still a slur, how come it isn’t used against her in common media? How come no one asks her “Why did your parents name you that?” or told “I can’t pronounce that”? “Becky” isn’t a slur, “Becky” is how Black folks, primarily Black women, can commiserate with other Black folks, primarily Black women, about the fact that dealing with Whiteness as the ideal, especially gendered Whiteness, is a real downer.

Even when White girls think that they’re being tongue-in-cheek cute by calling themselves “Becky”, they’re kinda saying “I’m White and proud of it” without throwing up the “Heil Hitler” salute. (Same for “basic”, they’re just saying they’re “worthless, White and proud of it”. That’s just pathetic.) Basically, to the ears and eyes of Black folks – primarily Black women – this is how it comes off:

2016-05-05-22-21-49.png

But hey, they do have what is culturally defined as “good hair”. And there’s a chance one of them may actually be named “Becky”. They’re just *really* proud of that fact.

Remember, Black girls have a massive hill to climb because of misogynoir (the combo hatred of race and gender). We’re always ragged on by everyone, from mainstream society to even in Black culture, about Whiteness and how we don’t add up. Bottom of the totem pole, last one picked, you get the idea. In Black culture, there’s even an idea of “marrying up” when you have a White partner, especially for a Black guy. Because of that ideal, that means the most basic Becky can show up, and she’s a hot commodity (think about the rise of Iggy Azelea) but a Black girl means nothing until she does something about her skin, body features and that hair….Oooh, that nappy, headed hair has got to go! ‘Cuz she ain’t gonna find herself no man until she got some good hair he can run his fingers through.

Speaking of ingrained cultural bullsh*t, let’s get to the second part:

“Good Hair”
Ahh, the hair debacle. If you’re a White girl, you’ll never have to go through this. Black? It’s a load of misery, regardless of texture.

It was an absolute pain for me when I went natural (stopped straightening my hair) because, maaaaaan, is Black hair politicized to the point I felt like I needed a Post Doc just to buy shampoo and a comb. It’s the first thing everyone will pick on in regards to success in life for a Black woman/girl. Wanna get a job? “You’re not gonna straighten your hair? They won’t hire you.” Wanna get a date? “No one is gonna love you with that Angela Davis nonsense you got on your head. Men don’t care about that, they like straight hair.” Wanna be seen as not threatening? “You look like a Black Panther. Lolz, why do you hate White people? All I said was it was ‘All Lives Matter’ makes more sense than ‘Black Lives Matter’.” Wanna have your humanity respected? “I just had to pet you, you remind me of my dog! So fluffeh! I just wanna shave it all off, stuff it all in my pillow and sleep on it” Wanna buy shampoo that’s for your hair texture? “Try the ‘ethnic’ aisle. It will be an arm and a leg. But there are perm kits there, too! Get all that ‘jungle’ out your hair and look cute.”

Now, let’s get into the Bad Hair/Good Hair debate.

Thankfully, there’s India Arie “I Am Not My Hair” music video to give us all a great starting point.

To pinpoint, her description is “Good hair means curls and waves/Bad hair means you look like a slave”.

Y’see, “good” hair emulates mainly European hair, which is a “nice” curly to an “ideal” straight. “Bad” hair basically means you have African ancestry because no one has hair like us. In its natural state, Black hair can break combs, be absolutely huge, and – when not cared for correctly – be a big pain in the rear for the person who decided to go natural.

Good hair/Blac- I mean, Bad hair has been ingrained in Black folks since we were first dragged here. Ditto with skin bleaches and “fixing” your nose. To get straight hair, you have to chemically alter it or use plain fire-like heat. You’ll have chemical burns on your scalp (just google the ingredients on a Black hair perm kit…try the brand “African Pride”. (Yes, the name. The internalized racism)) or third degree burns on your ears and scalp. But society will like you better for it, though! Just yells “Less dangerous” and “not angry” and “totes believe racism died when Obama went into office.” Don’t like using harsh science to fry your scalp? How about shelling out major cheddar for weaves, wigs and braids? Think you won’t need it? Fine, go see if you can land a job.

Actually, T-Pain said it best (yes, guys got their hair conked as well. What, you thought European ideals of beauty only affected Black Women?):

At this point in history, the present, Black girls are kiiiiiiiiinda tired of the “straight hair is good hair” chicanery. Especially with the waves of women going natural, the prejudice is still buried deep. Good hair should mean “hair that is well cared for, regardless of texture”, not “hair similar to White girls”. But still, it doesn’t. And it still can make Black women and girls feel like crap about themselves. Even Beyonce. Her hair is not naturally straight. If you’ve seen a picture of Solange Knowles, her sister, then you basically have a pretty accurate picture of what Beyonce’s hair would look like in a totally natural state. Why it isn’t in the natural state is perfectly up to Beyonce. Because it’s her hair. Because that’s how personhood works.

Luckily for everyone, there’s a documentary about this, called “Good Hair”, made by comedian Chris Rock. That’s where the T-Pain and co. clip came from. Here’s some more!

That’s a playlist of varied snippets. I really recommend watching the whole documentary. It is as comedic as it is informative.

And here’s a last bit from Tatyana Ali in her interview with VladTv, it’s really good.

Basically, considering yourself a “Becky with the good hair” is pretty insulting to Black people because of all the issue it’s brought us. Oh, and if you think you’re clever, Nivea thought the same with this ad:

2016-05-05-22-27-22.png

Yeah, not cool. It’s ok to say, “I have nice hair”, but don’t recite Beyonce on a socio-cultural and racially gendered struggle you literally have no idea about. It just sounds so…basic.

Alright, a little thing during my EEOC issue happened and while I was basically going through one of the worst experiences of my life, a post had happened across my personal FB timeline about Blackthorn Hoodoo Blend teas, created and made by Amy Blackthorn, a relatively big name in the Pagan community. If some of you all will remember, I reviewed the tea itself in an Open Box Review for Sabbat Box. I liked how it smelled and the tea tasted pretty decent but it’s that name. I really dislike the name.

Amy Blackthorn is White, Hoodoo is Afro-Caribbean (and so am I). Blackthorn doesn’t have any major background in Hoodoo culture or traditions to the point that it would be okay for her to use the name for part of her business moniker, which she is making money from. Also, the teas don’t have any connections to Hoodoo anything in culture, taste, type or anything, “hoodoo” is basically just a name. That’s cultural hijacking. She doesn’t donate or assist to Black communities, she doesn’t talk about race or anything that could possibly be seen as a saving grace. Nothing. It would have been better for her to simply name them “Blackthorn Celtic Blends” and that would have been at least a bit more accurate than “Hoodoo”.

I’m simply commenting as a normal person, not Black Witch, about the tea. Unfortunately, Blackthorn thought it would be smarter to block me than actually talk about her business choices head on because somehow being neglectful is a great business practice, even on the pages of their friends (Blackthorn and I have a mutual friend, that’s why we could interact, I was just commenting to my friend talking about the tea, I didn’t know Blackthorn would be about).

Prime business practices here

Prime business practices here

Blackthorn’s comment, as you could guess, was basically “Why don’t you like the name?” It was my responses that basically got me blocked from seeing future comments from Blackthorn. Apparently she must not like when being challenged about her business’ name. Which leads to wonder: “Why did she name it that if she didn’t want to deal with the package that comes with it?” I wasn’t even being snarky or nasty, just explaining my reasoning.

When I got blocked, I totally didn’t see it coming, I thought my FB was acting odd because I was on mobile:

 I really didn't know what happened, I've never knowingly been blocked before from causing butthurt

I really didn’t know what happened, I’ve never knowingly been blocked before from causing butthurt

Annnnnnnnd here comes a random person, out of nowhere but super predictably because Paganism is excruciatingly White, so I really shouldn’t be surprised. They’re defending the name choice. Remember, I’m Afro-Caribbean, they’re not. I don’t practice Hoodoo but it is more part of my culture than it is theirs, a White person. Also, it is because of Whiteness that Hoodoo is seen the way it is and with such the rep it has. There’s a whole cultural issue that is still very much ongoing because of this.

You can almost hear the "Feel the Bern, I'm not racist. I have a black guinea pig and I pet my Black friends always"

You can almost hear the “Feel the Bern, I’m not racist. I have a black guinea pig and I pet my Black friends always”

Here’s the thing…”Hoodoo” has everything to do with race. Part of how Hoodoo was born was literally from slavery because slave-owners did everything they could to rip and destroy cultural ties as a psychological tactic to mindbreak a mass group of people and turn into obedient and ever-fearing slaves. Same reason why slaves learning how to read and write was illegal, among other things, which still stretches quite a bit into modern times. Like education and jobs, for example. None of which I’ve ever seen Blackthorn remotely talk about. You want to have Hoodoo be considered worldly for all (read: White people) to use and do whatever with? Then get ready to talk about all the baggage that comes with it. The people lynched. The people oppressed. The people stolen. The people dehumanized into animals. The people brutally murdered. The people who rarely get to see justice. The people widely hated. Can’t approach that topic? Then maybe Hoodoo and Voodoo aren’t your bag. Try Wicca.

Hoodoo was mainly a clever way for Black people to retain and practice cultural beliefs and ideas cobbled together. Blackthorn has absolutely no idea what that is like or to have something of the sort in your cultural heritage, background or anything. Hoodoo, like Voodoo, is usually synonymous with “evil”, “dark”, “wicked”, “superstitious”, “dark people dancing in the night over feverish drums hexing innocent people they don’t like”. Stuff like that. Germanic, Roman and Celtic practices in Paganism are seen in a better, much more comforting light.

I try to explain to the person why the name is problematic.

2016-01-01-18.32.22.png.png

Now, it’s more than just Blackthorn who blocked me, several supporters of hers did that, mainly the people you saw that I responded to. Everyone, this is a bad idea. Why? Because even if no one lobbed epithets at me or anything, blocking me in refusal to talk about a racial issue they caused, it’s still racist. It’s still racism to blatantly use a word in reference to a culture you’re not part of for business purposes and to silence any and every one that calls you out on it. It’s still racism to not want to listen to people from that cultural background trying to explain to you why it’s racist. Bigotry comes in many forms and not all of them are abrasive and overt. Sometimes it’s just making sure to turn a conversation about Black historical and cultural beliefs into a “Whites Only” forum.

Blackthorn, in trying to duck an actual, non-aggressive conversation about the name of her business because it is problematic, is being racist about the whole thing. Racism isn’t all burning crosses and voting for Trump, it can be as quiet and simple as simply saying, “This is mine and I won’t listen to anyone about it because I don’t care, I just wanna make money.” Geez, if she were richer and hated her own gender, she could match Trump in idea. How much you wanna bet she finds that guy abhorrent…despite thinking just like him?

Her tea bins may as well be air, what’s the point patronizing her business? Even if she posted “Black Lives Matter”, it’s pretty clear she doesn’t genuinely feel that way. And people think White liberals and White Pagans are progressive. Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. But hey, what does she care? It’s just business.

Instead, here are some actual Black owned tea online stores:

Wystone’s World Teas

Wystone2

Look at that vast selection! And the prices are really good! A basic skim of the site seems like the average price is $6.95, it’s pretty great! There’s even a tea blog to learn new teas and types.

SoRen Tea

SoRen

This site looks really nice. The prices are greater but it’s moreso high-end. Try them out!

Update (April 1, 2016, 6:50 PM):

I posted this column to Twitter, including Blackthorn (@MorrigansWitch) in the tweet:
2016-04-01-18-39-39.png

This is literally what I get less than a couple minutes later:
2016-04-01-18-41-45.png

Seriously? How was I supposed to learn anything about her, her stance or anything? She blocked me the second she noticed I wasn’t a glowing review, not actually talked to me. It would be one thing if I had a convo with her, then posted this like nothing happened but newp, she basically blocked me from the get-go.

How I responded:

2016-04-01-18-40-52.png2016-04-01-18-41-22.png

Of course, in prime business sense, she is ignoring me. She’ll probably whinge on later about how I still don’t know anything about her and made an assumption from a quick interaction…that she, herself, axed so there wouldn’t be any continual discussion of any sort.

Everyone, especially White Pagan business owners, this is a really bad way to handle a problem. If you don’t like dissent, tackling head on is probably your best bet… or avoiding the thing that would get you dissent, like not picking a name that becomes racist on its face. If she talked to me originally, something that was her fault she didn’t do, this could have been pretty different. It’s a number of reasons why I didn’t like how she responded, all of which I already mentioned. This is basic business sense. She can’t complain “OMGZ, U dun know meh!” when she literally made sure that I wouldn’t be able to. Because she blocked me before really chatting with me. Killing all chance I could talk to her, which is all I wanted to do.

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