Category: Pagan Life


Wishing Wicked

Filed under: Pagan Life, Spells & Potions — Leave a comment
October 14, 2011

Hexing. Jinxing. Cursing. Bad juju. Whatever you want to call it, it is the act of inflicting harm on someone through magickal means. It is also the first thing that comes to other people minds when you say that you’re a Witch – as well as the source of their crappy jokes. (“Oh, don’t make her mad, she’ll hex you!”) Every book worth its salt will tell you not to hex or jinx because of the threefold karmic return and how there are other ways to solve the problem without having to resort to astral nasties. Even here on this blog I’ve said, “Don’t do it.”

Why am I not for hexing? Because it isn’t right to throw a monkey wrench undeserved into someone’s life. And people who believe hexing is fine and does it usually portray controlling personalities or become that way in my experience. Do I believe that some people need their just desserts? Yep. The same way that I believe some people can’t see how they are wrong in any given situation and would much rather cast a harmful spell than correct their own attitude. I would totally be for cursing if it didn’t give such ample room for douchbaggery.

Now, note I said “undeserved”. I believe that if you do bad things, bad things happen to you in return. While what is considered bad is a manner of perspective – a man stealing bread, for example – some people are thoroughly wronged. An example could be someone that Person A trusted totally betrayed them by being instrumental to Person A getting robbed or burgled. It’s not Person A’s fault, they didn’t know they were getting set up, and in response (after going to the cops and such), they want to jinx that person as payback. I have friends who have been through such a situation and that’s the route they took. I couldn’t diss them at all about it as my friends weren’t being wonton, as in attacking any ol’ random person out of anger. And if they weren’t sure, the jinx would be left open-ended to the attack the person or people responsible for the bad deed, whoever they are. Are my friends right in what they’re doing? Maybe, maybe not but they are not some derpy teen with a random spellbook and completely over-emotional. They are people who have already tried to be the nice guy and are at the end of their rope. The police may not be cooperative, the problem person may have decided to cause a ripple effect in their damage, etc etc., these are reasons that are valid. It is understandable why some people hex – why, it’s even part of how I got into Witchcraft.

Yep. I said it.

I think I made mention in my very first or second column that one reason why I got into Witchcraft (besides inherent interest) was that I wanted to hex my bullies back in high school. The school administration wasn’t doing anything, I wanted to simply be left alone and not so cruelly picked on. I didn’t care if the spell would kill them or not, I just wanted the bullies to go away. I’m tellin’ you, I rather chill with the Taliban than be around my bullies. You want to see what terrorism looks like? Just peer inside your schools, bin Laden would be taking notes. I never did hex any of my bullies because I was taught through the books I found that this is not the right way to use Witchcraft but it’s not like the thought never crossed my mind…over and over and over and….

Whether to harm or not has crossed my mind numerous times before as a Witch and also as a marital artist. There are tons of times I have figured life would run a lot more smoothly if I just jinxed someone submissive or put them in the hospital. The reason I haven’t done either is because I’m a person that would bobsled like a penguin with a turbo jetpack down the slippery slope. It’s good to have some self-restraint. Plus there have been countless times I have thought I was the right one when in the end it turned out I wasn’t. Yay for avoiding damage control and the super excessive guilt over realizing that actually I might have been the jerk. I don’t think I’m the only one who has been in such a situation.

Now, I have never jinxed and I am pretty solid in the “Don’t jinx” group because I wouldn’t feel right telling people that they are perfectly in the right to jinx people because, honestly, I don’t feel that way. Plus, you never know the mindset of the people you’re talking to and last thing I need is to give them a pass – or what they perceive is a pass – to cause harm. That’s part of why I don’t put spells up here, too. I don’t want some mentally unstable person tripping upon it and doing Gods-know-what with the info. What my friends do is of their choice, I wouldn’t supply them with a curse or anything because that’s not my ethics. If they say they’re going to do it, I’m just going to check in for a second as their conscience. I’ll just ask why and for the details to check and double check that they are truly the wronged party. After that, they’re on their own.

This is my opinion on jinxes. Karmic spells, otherwise known as grey magick, have a different opinion from me. Karmic spells serve mainly as a karma audit and responds as such. I’ve not casted those (Never had a reason to) but I’m not really against it, unless used way too loosely. It’s okay but only as a last resort – as spells should be – and barely used, if ever. The upshot of karmic spells that jinxes don’t have is that A) You’re not adding additional energy into someone’s life, just using whatever is already available by their own actions and B) The karmic spell audits both the good and the bad. This means that a person could be someone good generally but have a bad day and passed that on to a Witch via a run-in. So the Witch is moody and pissed now and cast the karma spell. Because the person is usually a good person and the spell is an audit on both sides, the person might actually have an exceedingly nice amount of good things happening to them and perhaps a few bad things because the person being targeted isn’t Jesus. To the chagrin of the Witch that preferred to have something bad happen, she or he may learn a lesson too through the whole ordeal. That, I favor over a hex because it’s a bit more fair than just plain putting bad happenings into someone’s life, whether they deserve it or not.

Another reason why I prefer karma spells over hexes is because not everyone knows they’re fouling someone else. I have been in the position where I didn’t know I was being a pest to anyone and I’m sure there are plenty of people out there like that, not deliberately trying to wrong someone, just makes a lot of awkward mistakes. It’s not fair to them that they should be wrongfully punished for something they didn’t know that they were doing. Some people have thinner skins than others, some people have absolutely no filter between their brain and their mouth, some people just are crappy with social interactions, etc. People are people and people are different – and annoying.

Now, are hexes all inherently evil via the use of devils and such? No, not at all. All it is, is the intent to disrupt and cause harm or worse through magickal means. Spirits and otherkin not necessary. I don’t bother with hexes though and same with most of my practicing friends. Too much to concern myself with and you need a particular mindset to go to the point of jinxing someone. Nothing is wrong with being miffed. Nothing is wrong with being fair and leveling the playing field either. But be fair, use karmic spells instead. The potential jerk factor drops by a considerable lot.

Okay peoples! This is the last column before the installments and I would like to tell people that if you have not submitted for the 2nd annual Samhain Pickers, please do so now! Samhain Pickers is a giveaway where I pick three people to do divination for with one of these styles:

– Tarot
– Cartomancy
– Dream Interpretation

Yes, yes, if you were here last year then you would know that I had slightly more selections but here’s the thing, I’m actually moving to a new apartment so that means limited time to do stuff. Still want in? Great! Send me an email (look on the About Me/Contact Me Page for info) with your

– Name
– Email
– What type of reading would you prefer (Choose One)

I will pick the three winners using Random.org’s number generator. Each email counts as an entry and a number. If you are the first email I get, you’re #1, thirteenth email I get, #13 and so on and so forth. That way it’s extremely random for the reader and easier to pick for me. I will draw winners on Oct 31 and we’ll go from there. Also, unless otherwise stated, there will still be the Black Witch vcast chat on Ustream. 9 PM EST, be there!

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Stop Asking Me!

Filed under: AfroPunk/The Establishment, Divination, Pagan Life — Leave a comment
October 7, 2011

The Establishment (Afro-Punk) Version

As a diviner, I love getting a plethora of questions – but not always. Sometimes I rather be much left alone instead of sought out for advice or getting a constant question and/or from a constant person which makes me wanna pack up and go home.

The question that I get waaaaaaaaaay too constantly as a diviner? Love or death but love has got to take the cake along with the pastry shop it sits in and the bakery it came from. Too many love questions, far too annoying. Look, I understand everyone wants to be loved but to constantly hear over and over, “When will I get a new boy/girlfriend”, “Should I date this guy/girl?” etc etc etc, it can be pesky. Why? Because the person will forever ask since they feel like they have a back-up system, namely the diviner they decided to latch on to give them the ethereal 411 on whether the person they’re dating or whether their health is up and running well (pertaining to the slew of death questions I get).

The problem with asking too much is just that, you’re asking way too much the same question or a multitude of questions enough that I would question if you’re capable of handling life without a helmet and a GPS sewn into your undergarments. It’s one thing when the person asking for a reading is friends with the diviner because there’s a background already established and the readings are just another element or resource in the friendship. The diviner is likely not to mind too much because as a friend, they want to see that readee succeed, be happy or do well for themselves. The readings are just another form of checking up on the readee/friend and making sure they’re making the right choices and foreseeing the bad ones. That’s a different take than some person who is contacting the diviner over and over because the diviner is, well, a diviner. There is no background and frankly, the diviner could be going through something serious in their own life but the readee would expect the diviner to put all that aside and get to work.

Media generally likes to tout diviners as mystical, magical creatures that are much like non player characters (NPCs) in video games and movies – they’re just sitting around doing nothing until that person who is in desperate need of having their palm read to make sure the girl they’re dating is the one they should or will marry bursts forth, foaming at the mouth in anxiety. Too bad that, according to my phone, email, work documents and other pretty realistic things, that’s not the case. The average diviner is not going to be waiting around for someone to run in like they’re on fire wanting a tarot reading just like the average diviner is not some creepy-looking Gypsy with a floofy turban and a crystal ball that’s ready to drain your pockets. Shucks, even diviners who are Gypsy aren’t creepy-looking Gypsies with floofy turbans and crystal balls ready to drain pockets. It’s stupid to say, “We’re people, too” but one would be stunningly surprised that it’s very commonly forgotten considering how many times I’ve had my phone blown up by people too paranoid (I like to call them “metaphysical hypochondriacs”) to live life on its own since they met me or anyone else who was remotely decent at offering advice towards the human condition.

When people ask way too much, it’s usually for things that can be solved with some common sense or a stern talking to. When it’s questions about love, I usually don’t have to do a reading, I just have to ask, sit, listen and respond because often time people play up problems far bigger in their minds than they actually are. It’s not a reading they need, just someone to sit there and listen/respond to their problems. However, it’s sadly not a soundboard these people want, oh noooo. Not “magical” enough, too normal. It’s got to be with something “unusual” such as playing cards or interpreting someone’s dream or handwriting. Something that may involve me wasting more time and effort than I actually have to all because someone is interested in seeing what they perceive as an interesting trick. This means I could tell them all the wicked nonsense I could drum up in my brain and so long I’m standing behind a tarot spread, that person just may believe me. It won’t matter if I’m right, wrong or just plain crappy at reading the future, these people will keep coming back because of the visual appeal.

And that can make any diviner moody.

Look, we diviners are good at telling the future because we worked pretty hard at it, believe it or not. Buuuuuuut we’re not fortune cookies and not fortune telling machines because life would be pretty boring to be someone else’s sidekick to their own super droll life. I try to make sure that I only have to do one reading a person because if you have to come back, that’s a problem. It’s one thing if a person I’ve read for comes back months later for a follow up because time has passed and variables may or may not have changed which could change the trajectory for the potential future but a person who consistently calls me because they want a reading a month later, a week later, a day later, an hour later – that’s real annoying. Like I said, it’s one thing if they’re a friend (especially since I’ve done this to my diviner friends in low times) but it’s another story altogether when it’s some person that I don’t really know that wants a reading. And another. And another. And another…

When it comes to subjects such as love and death, the future can change tons sometimes. And asking a diviner fifteen million times when “the one” is going to come by because the last reading wasn’t so positive doesn’t help nary a single iota. Yes, we know it’s a big deal, very important. Yes, it feel like no one is ever going to come in your life and hey, you might be right because not everyone falls in love. Yes, men/women can be weird/fickle/crazy/wack/[insert negative gender stereotypes and roles here], despite the glaring fact that the most common denominator of all these bad relationship is the person asking for the reading. But they have got to remember: divination is simply another way to give advice. It serves as a mirror of what’s going on, has gone on and is going to happen (with strong potential). The change lies within the person, not their ability in pestering someone to give constant and repetitive advice and that change takes time.

Yup, time. That little abstract concept that nobody who is waiting for something or somebody likes. Instead of being stagnant and nagging your local diviner with the same question over and over and over and over, create some change. Advice was given already and it’s not going to change because nothing incremental has happened. That means living life for itself and stop asking a billion questions on every minute detail, it doesn’t prevent mistakes, wack coincidences, freak occurrences and other things that are out of one’s control.

In short: once you get a reading, stop asking and start living. Unless you are friends with the diviner, then just gauge it out with them. And if you want love, adopt a pet. (And as an alternative, try the shelter pet project)

And now that it’s October comes the second annual Samhain Pickers Divination Giveaway! What do you get? A divination reading from me, Black Witch! Last year’s went ever so well, let do it again! All you have to do is submit an email with “Samhain Pickers” in the subject line and include in the email:

– Name
– Email address
– Type of divination desired (Choose from: Tarot, Cartomancy (playing card), natal chart, dream interpretation)

Your email is your entry form and you can only submit once. How the picking is done: I list the emails/entries as they come in so if you’re the first submission, you’re entry #1, if you’re the thirteenth submission, you’re entry #13. I use a random number generator (via random.org) to pick three winners on Samhain/Halloween. Acceptance for entries start now so submit! All readings are confidential.

Also there will be my second annual Black Witch Samhain Ustream chat which may be done via the Afro-Punk or Black Witch Ustream, also going to be on Halloween so be there! Times will be announced next week!

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Ask Black Witch: Off Day

Filed under: Ask Black Witch, Pagan Life, The Arts — Leave a comment
August 26, 2011

Alright, there’s no ABW’s for me to answer and currently I am packing up to head to New York City for the Afro-Punk Festival. It’s my second year and if you follow this blog, you already know some of the people I am very excited to see – okay, the one person we all know I am super stoked to see: Janelle Monae. Love her to death, she’s more than a refreshing breath of air to Black music. Plus, I get to see my wonderful mate, Kellindo, always a plus.

Now, since I have free space to talk about whatever, I would like to ponder and wonder why I get people coming to my blog, Black Witch, about Janelle Monae. It ain’t about her music either and I think I’m a leeeeettle outside the color spectrum to be mistaken for the Wondaland wordpress. It’s people wondering if Janelle Monae is a Witch.

A Witch.

Really? I know the music industry sucks super hard rocks right now and so does mainstream Black music (sorry, Lil’ Wayne is no one’s prayers and if you know Black music history – and Western media history in regards to race – you’ll clearly see why. Or just Google “Nicholas Brothers” and then look at a modern day Black music video for a quick overview) but Witchcraft? Are you seriously that stupid or the type to believe Jay-Z is a Satanist and the music industry is ran by the Illuminati?… Wait, wait, both the former and the latter are pretty much one and the same, I guess I should find a how-to for tin-foil hats so these people can get something worthwhile out of this blog. A Witch? Janelle Monae, a what? Witch? Wait, what? Why? Because she does the Tightrope and wear suits? Then what the hell does that make me?

Okay, readers. For the record, I’m a Witch. I cast spells. I make potions. I do divination. I’m Pagan. Janelle Monae does not cast spells. Janelle Monae does not make potions. Janelle Monae does not do divination. Janelle Monae is Christian. And most of all, she is definitely not a Witch. I’ve been around Wondaland, Janelle Monae’s people – I’m friends with the guitarist, remember? – and I’ve had to worry about them, Monae included, not accepting me and my witchcraftin’ self. Man, I still do and it’s been over a year. I still remember one of Janelle Monae dancers hopping behind Kellindo when I brought up Black Witch – a reaction that does not come from people who already know Witches but the exact opposite, trust me.

The reason why this all bugs me so? The short answer is “Because people are stupid and that bugs me.” The defined answer is because it’s ridiculous that a person – no, a Black woman, is actually doing right for herself, her gender and her race by actually relying on her talents and not her tits to sell her music – I’m thinkin of one who stumbled through lolita and made aplenty Black lolitas rue, her wigs are colorful though – and because she’s not desiring to become another stereotype but is still being successful, someone has to think magick is behind it. Not talent. Not the fact we are in the middle of a talent drought in all forms of the fine arts. Not the fact that 2010 is her breakout year but she’s been at it since ’04/05. Not the fact that she’s got friends in pretty high or important places such as Big Boi of Outkast or even Puff Daddy/P. Diddy. Magick, is what people think. Hello, I’m a Witch and I can say short of selling your soul to Satan, no one simply rockets to the top fresh out the oven. And even that may not ensure anything besides feeling empty from the fame. How do I know? I’ve been around the music industry, it’s no cupcakes and rainbows. Well, maybe it is, if the cupcakes were poisonous and the rainbows rained poo and every pot of gold found was more like a shiny, distracting rock. (‘Tis purdy, though!) Janelle Monae is a hard worker, that’s the reason of her success. Not witchery. Work. Her energy is amazing but that doesn’t promise she’s a Witch. I know lots of people with strong energy, and very few of them are Witches. Still amazing and enchanting at what they do though.

I think another reason it bugs me is, well, I’m a Cancer in three planets (Sun, Mars, Mercury (Rx)) so when I care, I care deep. When I support, I support, especially when it means something more to me than just doling out another cd. Janelle Monae and her music means a lot to me as an alt-culture Black girl raised in the hood in Baltimore. My only regret is that her music couldn’t come sooner to make me feel less alone when I was growing up. Plus, it’s that whole “friend of a friend” thing that can also prod me. Kellindo is my friend and I extend my kindness to anyone he cares for too. That’s just me. Oh, and I’m a Witch, I love setting the record straight whenever I can whenever it comes to my area of expertise. For example, I still think Michelle Bachmann* Christine O’Donnell is a batty and racist moron as well as a sign the Republicans really can find someone who’s worse than Sarah Palin, who was worse than Bush.

So yeah, any future “Janelle Monae, Witchcraft” search terms to my blog gets the same old treatment as always: made fun of on my Twitter, around friends and to my potential pool of 8,000+* readers. To those going, “Black Witch, be nice! It could be genuine inquiry, leave room for that.” You’re right, and to that I say the inquirer should have had some sense to listen to her discography before asking such a stupid question. That’s like someone asking me if I’m really a Witch after reading this blog. Besides, the inquirer will use their context clue skills, I’m all for intellectual advancement! And those who assume that an artist is using occult means to get ahead seriously do not know how the music industry works. The industry can be quite evil, I’ll admit, but no need to play it up like Voldemort own Atlantic Records and everyone signed to it has the Dark Mark hidden on them somewhere.

So, no. Janelle Monae is not a Witch. She’s a musician. There you have it. Deal.

Now I got that out my system, I’m off to NYC, da Big Apple! I will be pestering Cee-lo Green, meet a couple readers, maybe sign something, chill with Kellindo proper, fangirl around Janelle Monae, say hi to Santigold and listen to the Bad Rabbits. Say hi if you see me! Bring a print out of your favorite post, I’ll totally sign it!

Also, next month is a Black Witch series titled “Black Diamonds and Pearls”, which looks at Black girls in the Lolita fashion. Normal Pagan-related postings will resume in October. And check out my interview with Daughters of Eve on Patheos.com!

Editors Note: It’s Christine O’Donnell, not Michelle Bachmann, who claimed she did Witchcraft when she was a teen. I still find Michelle Bachmann both bigoted and batty, though.

*Was 8,000 but Afro-Punk has gotten over 10,000 at this point. Remember, this site is just the external version.

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“I Dun Wanna Die!”

Filed under: AfroPunk/The Establishment, Divination — Leave a comment
August 12, 2011

The Establishment (Afro-Punk) Version

NB: I will be short on time to do the Ask Black Witch for this month due to the Afro-Punk Festival so if you have a question to submit, please send it now! Check the About Me/Contact Me page to learn how.

What’s a fairly common question I get when doing divination? Death. “Am I gonna die?”, “When am I gonna die?”, “Can you see when my death is?” Seriously wanna make you speed up the process while doing Darwinism a favor.

First and foremost: Yes, you’re going to die. Everyone is. It’s a terrible fact of life that is not easy to come to grips with but everyone you know and love, including yourself, is going to kick the bucket hardcore one day. It’s not a fun fact but a true fact. Unless someone’s got some immortality secret, everyone is bound to meet their Maker one day. The main question is whether it will be sooner or later.

I don’t do death divinations in that, no I don’t care to predict when or how you are going to die and frankly, I couldn’t care less. I know it’s a common thing in movies and television for some normal individual get a palm reading and the fortune teller says with a knitted brow that their end is very near, possibly at the hands of some very misfortunate events or a psycho-killer. Or maybe the normal person will get their tarot cards read and dun dun duuuuun – the Death card shows up.  Then the victim dies or escapes death or helps someone mistakenly die or escape death somewhere down the line in the script. Cut and scene.

What’s up with all this dying nonsense? Diviners aren’t death clocks. Unless reeeeaaaaaallllly close and possibly related to something very imminent such as health taking a turn for the worse or something like that, death isn’t that easy to spot and certainly something diviners shouldn’t be looking for. Besides, divination isn’t even that scary, not even the Death card.

Revelations Tarot

Let’s talk about the Death card, one of the most popular divination depictions in entertainment, especially when a plot twist or foreshadowing is needed to keep the story (and viewer’s attention) going. It’s card number 13 (XIII) in the major arcana in your average, run-of-the-mill tarot deck. Usually defined with a symbol of death almost regardless the deck so it could be a scythe, the grim reaper, a skeleton, etc. It’s always refers to death somehow. In the deck I use, The Revelations Tarot, the death card is symbolized by the Hindu death goddess Kali dancing while balanced on a scythe and a skull lingering in the background. Now, I’ve had this card show up in my readings for myself tons of times and haven’t freaked out once over it. It’s just the death card symbolizes more often than not a symbolic death instead of a physical death. It’s the end of something, a job, a relationship, education, etc etc. It could be downsizing at work, a break up or a graduation, something that’s going to bring the current or future situation to a stop. Nothing vicious there, everything has to end someday, especially for something new to come along. The Death card is more about transformation than someone simply croaking. The only way I would ever concern myself with the Death card and actual death is if the Three of Swords were right beside it because that’s usually symbolized with a heart that has three swords in it and that’s a little piece of lore that I was taught. Even then I wouldn’t say, “Zomgz! You’re gonna die! …Can I have your watch and tv?” but more along the lines of, “I think there might be a health warning in this spread, have you seen your doctor lately?”

If it’s not tarot, it’s palmistry I get the “Am I gonna die?” questions. I seriously don’t know why but I’m a-guessin’ it’s got something to do with stuff that’s either on the big screen or small screen. That and lore which floats around and tells you that you can be told of your death on the palm of your hand. Either that or people who probably have no lives that are desperately trying to come off as funny or cool but succeed only as coming off annoying and stupid sounding.

It is possible to find out when you’re going to croak through palmistry because unlike tarot, it’s a more expansive form of divination that looks at more the forest than the trees. If you can work the timing on your hands very well (a pretty tricky talent to hone), it is possible to learn of your death but I doubt those who are suicidal or have abrupt deaths all have short life lines on their palms, there’s more that goes into situations like that which would spell it out. Things such as proneness to bouts of depression and a complex that makes a person refuse help or deny acknowledgement of the notion that they need help in the first place (can lend itself to suicide), to have a run of bad luck or terrible coincidences, etc etc etc (could lend itself to accident).  Palmistry uses timing using either two things, the mercury mound under the pinkie finger, the venus mound resting as the padding of the thumb which measures the life line. However, I just about never do death timings because as I have stated before, I have no interest in them. Besides, you’re going to find out one day.

Even with the availability of being able to discover timing of death, it’s not all a sure thing. Just about nothing in divination is written in stone and hence has the potential to be avoided. Keep a healthy diet, exercise, stop smoking, etc etc, things of that nature which naturally extends life. Granted, there are some things that just can’t be stopped in life for some reason or another. Sometimes, something is bound to happen one way or another but hey, that’s life. Either way, yes, you’re going to die. Everyone you know is going to die. People come and go on this earth always, you and those that you know are no different.

It’s just a matter of when, where and why and that, you’re going to have to find out on your own.

Next Week on The Arts!: Short Films!!!!!!!!!!!

– Sijia Luo
– Vancouver Film School
– Wong Fu Productions

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Ask Black Witch

Filed under: Ask Black Witch, Dreams, Resources & Information, Spells & Potions — 2 Comments
July 29, 2011

I know it’s not strictly enforced (because it never had to be) but actually I have a three question monthly quota. Since this is the first month I’ve actually gone over, I’ll answer all questions. I keep the quota around just in case I get a slew of questions but since this is really a first, I have no issue answering everything. Same for the upcoming months unless there are more and more question filled months but I provide warning first. In short, all is spiffy.

I have been cursed or hexed to not have or keep money. What can I do to break the hex or curse? Or what can I do to attract success or money to me.
– Louis R.

Usually when people come to me saying they’ve been cursed, I’m a bit of a skeptic but only because I’ve seen many people come to me claiming to be cursed when really it could be their own downfall or a general downfall that’s been going around (i.e. bad economy, illness, stress) and not a curse. The general rule of thumb is that the more developed a nation, the likelier that someone has not been cursed really but got some bad luck going but even then you have to stratify that to socio-economic levels and environments (in other words, if you’re upper class and fairly wasp? It’s probably bad luck, mate) so still people can get hit with a hex but it’s not common. Improbable but not impossible, basically.

Now as for Louis, I can’t tell for sure if you’ve been actually jinxed out of money, I’d have to hear more to be able to rule out the fact we are currently in a pretty sluggish economy and as of this writing, with US unemployment at 9% and Black unemployment at 16% and even big businesses are feeling the brunt of the economy. That can have an easy chain effect on a person’s spending and finance. Also, hexes don’t come from nowhere (no one really hexes a random person just for the screw of it, that’s mad rare) so if it’s not really traceable (as in, without doubt. Not, “Well, I got that weird coworker…”), it could be unfortunate circumstances that has fallen upon your head. I’m just throwing that out there to make sure you know what you should look for roughly when it comes to figuring out if it’s bad luck or bad juju.

How are you hexed out of keeping money? Surprise bills? Things keep breaking that are in constant need of repair (and shouldn’t be)? Mugged every time you step off your front step? Banks constantly go, “’Paychecks’? What’s that?” Magick takes the path of least resistance usually but when it comes to hexes, they can throw in wrenches like none other. For example: Say you have been magickally knocked in the pockets. It could express itself by the bank losing track of say, your direct deposit and no one’s been notified. You don’t have money (that you honestly should) in your bank account, which you seriously did not know and so you spend like normal, which hits you with overdraft fees and not-so-nice letters from the banks, possible not-so-nice letters from bill collectors and you try to check into it but every human on a computer is saying all is fine and you screwed up (even though it was an error in the system, either human or technical) and because the blame is pinned squarely on you, ya gotta fork up some cash to remedy (which, remember, you don’t have because of your status of direct deposit went awry) and that all snowballs into a giant headache, to put the ending nicely. These are all situations that could and has happened to people in the past: banks making mistakes on accounts, programs have an error, unknown overdraft fees get accumulated, banks going “Not me” even when it is squarely their fault, etc etc. They’ve all happened before in human history of modern finances. But it’s quite a queer probability all of that happening at once and if it’s pretty sudden as well as have a super hard time being corrected, as if obstacles keep falling onto your path.

If what I described above sounds pretty close to your situation, then yep, you just might be right, someone’s put a fix on you. How to solve it? Depends on your background and how good you are with faith and spirituality. If you are particularly spiritual and part of a particular religion (i.e. Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, etc etc), then generally you’ll be able to find some prayer that’s meant for protection from evil and harm as well as for prosperity and good fortune. Faith would seriously do some good now because prayers and rituals can’t be done without heart in them. Salt is useful for neutralizing but I’m not at the point where I’m going to tell you to sprinkle it about (and if you do, don’t do it on your lawn, it’ll kill the grass). Hexes are spells just like any other, they come in different kinds and thus must be handled differently. Dragon’s Blood (it’s a resin and can come in the form of oil, incense and even a bath solution) is good for uncrossing and for protection. Patchouli and Jade are great for finance and success. I’m giving beginner’s grade stuff because I don’t know your background in magick and I don’t want to suggest anything that has a very good chance of screwing up if you don’t know what you’re doing. Also since I don’t know the nature of the potential jinx, I can’t really subscribe anything more particular than that. Believe it or not visual mediation may also best aid you in severing ties from your hex (that should have prayer woven in there somehow because you can’t do it on your own) by visualizing actual dark ropes you are severing mentally.

Granted this is if all your money troubles stems from a hex, remember. If life is still pretty crappy no matter what you do, it could be life throwing you a hardball that’s completely striking you out. Hopefully things will work out.

Hi, I have read your blog and seen you on facebook… My question is that I done a prosperity spell last week visualizing that I make sales at my telemarketing job, it worked the first time  ( I made a sale)  but the second time nothing happened. Strangely I got called 2 days later about a job offer working for a company that I love and a career I love! I don’t have the job yet because it opens later this month but it seemed very strange that all the sudden after the ritual they called me… just wondering.
– Olivia L.

How astonishing! You have my first name. I would say definitely that it was probably the ritual helping you out to do bigger and better things. Now for the reason why something happened the first and not the second time: Magick, not always like the movies, does not promise you’ll get it in each and every time. Plus the spell could have bundled up energy from what could have been the second good sale in a row and become a big opportunity altogether, which is forever better. I hope you’re happy in your new position!

I happen to know a couple of these ‘preachers’ that frequent the buses down in this county, and it does annoy me, but what can I do about it?
– Torrence B.

This question is in reference to the recent post Get Off the Bus. My suggestion is either get some good headphones to blast them out, debate with them until they note their own fallacies and shut up or you might just have to deal with it until they get off or you get off. It’s not easy dealing with people like that, I’m certain, but sometimes you can’t do something or may not have the will to do it. I wouldn’t upfront suggest debate because not everyone has an extensive amount of religious knowledge and it can be a battle of personalities too so if you don’t have a dominant personality or just an expression of strong yet silent will, it could put you in a bad spot because these people don’t really respond or dialogue, they just think it’s the Devil in you making you speak out and shut them down so they may simply grow more persistent and shouting matches help no one. If you have the knowledge and background to flip whatever they say on its ear, perhaps go for it because I can say for myself it does make them pipe down but if you don’t have what it takes, that’s okay. It’s not okay that these people take free license to be total bigoted douchebags who don’t know the difference between spreading the word of God and forcing it down people’s throats but your well-being has to go before their empty-headed ways. Informing the bus driver may not do anything except get you scolded and that’s not good. So your best bet is to get a good Mp3 player with nice headphones and slip them on when they start yappin’.

Hi and nice to meet you. I come from a very strong Christian background so this is a very big step for me it’s just god irritates me so you know. By the way this may be a rather long message but please read it I am desperate to get an answer I have tried so many other people and not got a reply. So please let me tell you a bit about my self so this will all cover the question I need to ask.

I hate how I look I have a big nose and thin lips and puffy eyes and I am always either pink or red and I am very prone to spots.

I also look a lot like my mum and we aren’t on the best of terms right now so I would prefer to look more like my dad. Recently I have met a girl who I imagine would look just like my dad’s daughter if there was no interference from my mum. It’s also a rather funny story actually because my friend looks a lot like her dad who she does not like and I also look a lot like her mum so it’s really weird. So I was thinking what if I had been born in her body and she had been born in mine so we would still be recognised as the same person who we are now. so obviously it would be very difficult as you can probably imagine to find spell that would have the power to do that so I was thinking about trying to make my own spell or maybe you could give me a spell hopefully but if not I will try and make my own but another question is is would a spell be able to change the past because I’m not just talking about a body switching spell I am talking about a spell that could actually change the past!

I don’t want to be a different person I still want to be me just to have been born in another person’s body. I also don’t really know if making up my own spell would work so I guess that’s three questions altogether and I really hope you can help me. Hope I hear from you soon
– Jershua

It sounds like two interconnected questions to me.

I read your question over several times (It was a little hard reading, mate. I figured the British prided their language more than us Americans) and I’m going to be quite frank and start with the bottom and go up. You say you don’t want to be a different person but you actually do. Your whole letter bleeds with that intention because in your mind, you think you can escape your mom (and ultimately the bad relationship with her) if you were just in another physical body or to switch up the past. You could switch bodies with anyone from your friend to your next door neighbor to the Prime Minister, but keep the same mind and you’ll always be tortured because your problem is in your mind, not on your face. You could cast a spell to change the past but I can pretty much assure you what you’re asking for is waaaaaay beyond your skill set and most likely will forever be since you’re tipping into high magick and that’s no walk in the park. I have major difficulties with it and I’m a practiced Witch of nearly ten years. Besides, by changing the past to change the present and the future, how do you know the wheel of fortune will spin in your favour the second time around?

Now, since you would have someone to switch bodies with, your good friend who doesn’t like her dad, how do you know she would want to switch places with you? Can’t exactly pull a “body snatchers” thing, especially not on an unsuspecting and new friend. And how do you know you would be happier in her life – actually, body since changing bodies doesn’t promise a life switch – than you are in yours and that she vice versa? It just sounds a little one sided in your question. Even if you two equally do want to switch bodies (but not minds), what happens if one of you want to switch back?

Even in the vastness of magick, possibilities can come with limits and things happen for a reason. It’s clear you want to separate yourself from the hurt and that makes total sense but this really is not the way. You don’t like your physical features because of who they relate to so there’s nothing you can do really that would truly heal your problem on the physical level except to deal with them on the mental and emotional level where they reside. Work on whatever problems you have with your mother because running won’t solve anything. Talk to a counselor, therapist or someone that you trust to help iron out the problems. That’s the only way to solve this issue. The problems you have with your body are simply red flags to a deeper issue that need far more attention than the shape of your nose and lips. And try some Witch Hazel solution for your skin, it takes care of the red very well and keep spots at bay with consistent use.

I apologize if this is a strange question, but I was browsing and found your site, and was curious if you had an answer for me.   First off, let me say that I am not a pagan, nor am I very familiar with pagan customs; but, I felt that if I wanted to gain some understanding, I’ve got nothing to lose in asking and searching.

So, as for my question:

I have been having an interesting recurring dream.  Well… sort of.  I’ve had an interesting recurring “visage” lately.  Every couple of nights or so, I drift off to sleep and I see this girl.  She has lovely features, but never says a word.  In my dreams I often walk with her and talk to her.  (The setting is always a moonlit glade or stream).  She simply smiles and listens until I wake up.

Well about a month ago, I had the most peculiar thing happen.  I was laying, staring up at my ceiling in the dark early morning.  I think I must have only been half awake, but I could feel a presence in the room with me.  And just for the strangest moment, I felt a cold but calming touch on my face…. and (this is going to sound really bizarre) I saw the girl’s smiling face in a glimpse and she kissed my cheek… I think.  As I startled awake, the image and feeling was gone.

I know I must sound completely insane, or that it’s just my “hormones” running away with me.  It’s for this very reason I haven’t told ANYONE about this.  I can’t explain how, what or why, but this being whatever she is, feels so real to me.   I am currently happily in a relationship, and yet the “girl” doesn’t seem to care.  What’s really strange is that, being with her feels natural…  It doesn’t feel in any way conflicting with my current relationship…  Which makes me feel a little guilty.   

Again, I know I must sound crazy.  Please forgive the strangeness of my question..  but I am just curious if you, as a witch, had any sort of insight for me.

Truly and sincerely yours,
S.S.

If I had a nickel for every “This is a strange question”, “I’ve an interesting dream” or “I must sound crazy”, I would never worry about money again.

Have you ever thought that this dream could be crafted by your own mind because sometimes a cigar is just a cigar? I don’t know how long you’ve been having this dream versus how long you’ve been dating the girl you’re currently with but it sounds like you’re just having a happy dream. It doesn’t mean that you don’t love your girlfriend, it doesn’t mean you’ve gone nuts, it could just mean that you’re just dreaming. Even the half-asleep part, which is probably you already being halfway in the dream state hence touches and things like that feel real.

Nothing to feel guilty over until you put more focus on the dream girl than the real girl or even worse, try to turn the real girl into the dream girl. People can have reoccurring dreams of good things just like they can have reoccurring dreams of bad things. So go with it unless things take a turn for the worse.

That’s all the Ask Black Witch for this month! Want to ask a question? There are various ways to contact me! Everything is on the About Me/Contact Me page but you can also use the Ask Black Witch Submission Form on the right or tweet me @thisblackwitch and/or using the #askblackwitch hashtag. ABW questions are answered on the last Friday of every month.

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Get Off the Bus

Filed under: AfroPunk/The Establishment, Pagan Life — 4 Comments
July 8, 2011

The Establishment (Afro-Punk) Version

Bus preachers. I don’t know if they exist anywhere else but they’re a staple in the Black community. They’re Christians who either are pastors doing unnecessary overtime or wannabe pastors preaching what is not entirely their flock. They believe everyone should hear the word of God – regardless whether everyone wants or needs to or not.

They bleat to their captive audience the glory of the Lord and His Father and how good They are to the preacher and how all should rejoice and be gladeth in it for this is the day that the Lord has made. All who refuse the notion is an outright sinner that will verily soon feel the dark persecution of the Lord for unknowingly siding with the Devil and his wicked ways. Everyone else should get right with their life too because Judgment Day is comin’. It’s comin’ and there won’t be no foolin’ God so be faithful to the Lord, be gladeth in His creations – or suffer.

God, how annoying.

I’ve got nothing against the Christian God, really, but some members of his fan club ought to go on mute when it comes to preaching in public places. It’s rude, myopic and frankly, very annoying. They’re not blind to the idea that not everybody is Christian but totally deaf to the notion that Christianity is not for everyone so all that preaching could be going down a sink. It is not fair to me, the Pagan, that I have to hear you preach simply because the Lord compels you but if the tables were turned, it would be problematic and praising the Devil somehow.

I don’t mind discussion of religion, I think that’s fantastic or I wouldn’t go through the trouble of having a comment section, a fan page, twitter, email or P.O. Box otherwise. But discussion is very, very different from preaching. Preaching is not discussion, it is very one-sided and the only time the preacher allows talking is for the call and response and the response isn’t a free response, but something you’re supposed to say. Preaching is great in church (given the subject stays on God, Christ or the Bible) because all the listeners are supposed to be there and attentive, just not on a bus filled with diverse beliefs where the people who don’t believe the same don’t need to hear all that preaching.

Some may think it isn’t right but I usually challenge bus preachers (street preachers don’t bother me as the audience isn’t captive, just walk away). Hey, they felt like spoiling my ride and my quiet, surely they should expect some repercussion somehow, some way, some day. It’s fun to debate sometimes and since just about all arguments I have heard before, it makes for nice entertainment. See, I was raised Christian, these Christians can’t go super far being challenged before they trip up somewhere and start backpedaling – and that’s usually where the fun begins. I’ve learned that bus preachers are pretty ignorant about any religion (and even other denominations) that aren’t theirs and actual political religious history, hence mad easy to trip up.

I am very aware that it is a must for Christians to spread the word of God but there are ways to go about it that doesn’t have to come straight out of the “Unbelievably Annoying” category. Paganism doesn’t have (nor I think condones) proselytizing but in my experience of dealing with Christian friends, readers and people, what works best is to not blast it out and force it down people’s throats. Express it through living, that goes a lot farther because that person is just doing them, nothing to get mad or annoyed at and everything to admire. Not only that but it doesn’t kill them that they’re willing to understand beliefs that aren’t their own. See, then you, the Christian, may feel free to talk about your faith because I don’t feel harped at about mine.

As said before, Pagans don’t preach or proselytize – it’s part of the religion not to yammer broadly in the ears of those who don’t want to hear it – but I have heard of Pagans who have participated in doing this, just to the lower degree of waiting to be provoked instead of standing up and ruining everyone’s commute. Pagan fundamentalists, they’re called. They’re fewer in number than the Christian variety but look and act the same, just with 14% more crazy and 32% more self-embarrassment. I’ve never met one (or it would be up here on Black Witch toute suite) but from what I heard, “wack” isn’t word enough for these people. It’s something beyond “trifling” and somewhere in the neighborhood of, “Lol, wut?” Granted if I did meet one, I’m afraid I would – excuse my momentary vulgarity – have to dick with them just because. They spew outright nonsense as super pseudo-environmentalists, probably couldn’t tell you a single country the equator passes through and their minds got way too hyped from Live Earth. They don’t understand the nature part of Paganism (which is 99% of the foundation of the religion) and honestly, they could afford a piping hot cup of Shut The Hell Up.

My main thing? Don’t shove your religion down other people’s throats. Just live, leave me alone and followers will come if they feel it in their hearts. Have a nice trip.

On a lighter note, tommorow is two things: The Black Weblog Awards live ceremony (which, sadly I won’t be physically there for) which will be broadcasted at the Black Weblog Awards site and the pre-orders for this blog’s very first book Black Witch: Life from the Black Pagan Perspective, vol. 1 starts. The book will drop on Sept. 9th through Lulu publishing so if you want to pre-order, go to the Black Witch Shoppe page for info.

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Back In The Day: “Faker Faker: How to Spot a Con”

Filed under: AfroPunk/The Establishment, Divination — Leave a comment
July 1, 2011

The Establishment (Afro-Punk) Version

I made these when I was the president of my university’s Pagan Student Union. This mini guide is basically for those who want to seek out a psychic parlor to get a reading and not want to be jipped. Now while I do personally suggest people simply learning divination on their own since it’s a lot cheaper and not that difficult, some folks would like to still go to a diviner for guidance. Here are the tips:

Faker faker #1: Conduct of diviner
Does the diviner act like a normal person or a car salesman desperate to make a deal? Some cons will bear down on you like a hawk or even try to give you some info about yourself that you probably already knew or that you gave away. For example, she may note that you’re a traveler or a big spender. You may think that’s novel but you could be using a very fancy and expensive phone or letting off that you like to be adventurous.  A diviner is a normal person, just like you, and should act so. If they act the least bit odd, walk out.

Faker faker #2: You seem to have to keep paying for more information
You originally walked in for a mini tarot reading for $5 and now you got yourself a full tarot reading with a special palm love reading, astrology job reading, a special good luck kit and what the weather is going to look like in the next month before you head to Sri Lanka, though you have no travel plans whatsoever. Total: $350 and counting. A diviner shouldn’t be pressuring you to pay for more than what you want. Sometimes you just have to be assertive and tell them that you just want the reading you asked for and that’s it but they will try to lure you with cliffhangers (“Oh! But I see this mysterious someone that could be coming into your life. S/he may be the one maybe, I could look further with a palm reading—but that’s aside the point…”) but don’t take them. It’s just more sensationalism to get you out your money. A good diviner usually does a reading without side commentary. All divination is, honestly, is to give sound advice. Nothing outrageous, just normal advice.

Faker faker #3: Gotta give up something “Cursed”
Somebody you love or you are gonna die! Quick! Fork over that heirloom diamond ring your mother passed down to you — It’s cursed! Seems like the more pricier it is, the more cursed it is. Capitalism sure can be a downer sometimes. However, be rest assured that most likely the stuff you own doesn’t have a hateful spirit or something bound to it. If the diviner is trying to give you a serious scare story for something in particular, chances are it’s expensive and can be pawned for a lot of money. I think you should call the cops on this one, this is racketeering.

Faker faker #4: Tricked into casting a spell/you’re “cursed”
Your ancestors somehow slapped Abe Lincoln and stomped on a dodo, now you’re paying the price as their kin. To correct the past, you have to buy $400 leather shoes from Nordstrom (can’t be from anywhere else), spit in them at 4 AM for a week and bathe in lye for a month. If what they ask you to do sounds against your religious beliefs, downright insane, illegal or something you would laugh at someone else for doing, you shouldn’t do it either. They’re pumping money out of you somehow and screwing you over in the process. The truth: Most people aren’t cursed, just a run of bad luck. People don’t really jinx each other that much. If the diviner says you’re cursed and want you to do unethical and pricy stuff to nix it, you’re probably not. Proceed with running and calling cops.

I’m not sure if many, if any, saw the old website or even read that part (it was all super glitchy) so I figured why not put it up here where it can be seen more? I wrote this after teaching Divination 101 classes for PSU after talking about it as a whole and noticing a lot of people have no exact clue how not to get hoodwinked.

In addition, I had on the “Truths and Myths about Pagans” page a small FAQ about diviners:

Firstly, I personally can see how divination can be turned into a cash cow. All you need is something people can’t entirely explain but believe works, desperate folks in need of guidance and those same people to have nice amounts of money (gullibility works fine too) and then you have religion—I mean a cash cow. 

There are cons in pretty much any field. Quack doctors, lawyers, priests, scientists—you name it, someone did it. Divination is no different and there’s plenty about. Cons, like Ms. Cleo, usually prey on people who they believe are in so much distraught they don’t think sensibly about the advice they’re given or money they’re about to fork over. Often a con uses what they see, what you say and fear tactics (“oh, so and so is going to die if you don’t…”) to get your cash.

So there you have it, a mini-guide on how to get your divination done and not to have your pockets done in. I still recommend my readers to learn divination themselves but if you don’t want to at least now there is a guide that can tell you what to look for and what not to go for. I’ve never gotten a reading in a psychic parlour before – I’ve been in them but mainly to mess with the pseudo-diviners for kicks. But many I know have and it’s unbelievable – and downright funny for some of them – how they got the wool put over their eyes and so soundly at that. Still got questions? Just throw them in the comments or email me or fill out an Ask Black Witch form or any other way to talk to me. As always, I answer them all.

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Ask Black Witch

Filed under: AfroPunk/The Establishment, Ask Black Witch, Coming out of the Broom Closet, Pagan Life — Leave a comment
June 24, 2011

The Establishment (Afro-Punk) Version

It’s the first Ask Black Witch of the second year of Black Witch. How delightful! I’m also happy because no more grinding for votes and donations to send me to L.A. for the Black Weblog Awards. No, sadly I didn’t make the goal of $500, close but not good enough. I’m currently in talks with BWA and Afro-Punk about all this to see what still can be done. Yes, I really would like to go but circumstances are circumstances.

But note: Soon I’ll probably be grinding for votes for the Black Web Awards (different from the Black Weblogs Awards). Geez, I feel like I’m running for president.

Why is divination so bad?
– Unknown

Now, I’ve never used something in the Top Searches of my website as an Ask Black Witch question but I felt this was appropriate because a lot of people still think this, that divination is evil and a contract with the devil or something crazy like that.

To break down the word “Divination”, the root word is “Divine” which, if you don’t have a dictionary around, is in reference to deity or of heavenly nature. Basically, it’s a positive word. Divination is just working with the deities or tapping into the collective unconscious of the universe, as some like to describe it, to draw the best case scenario of the upcoming future based on the present and past, including all things that are seen and unseen, known and unknown (to the inquirer). No use of devils or demons needed or wanted, even prayers aren’t necessary. If it were of demonic nature, it would not be called divination and the root word would definitely be something that refers to “bad; not good; why are you doing this?” There’s no summoning of the spirits or anything like that, just plain old you and the universe and whatever it knows.

Now, if divination isn’t that scary, why does it get such a bad rap? Rumor mills during the Christian expansion throughout Europe and the world. Christianity (and Islam and I’m not so sure about Judaism but I’m going to err on them agreeing too) doesn’t really like divination because technically, you’re not supposed to know your future (since all your faith is supposed to be in God so there’s no need to figure out what’s gonna happen next so long He is there beside you) and that diviners and anyone else who can predict the future and do mystical and interesting stuff simply had to make a deal with the Devil to be able to do the exact same thing a prophet can – I always found that a bit uncanny – and was not a true lover/fearer of God and His might. Spread that around for a few centuries and boom, you’ve got yourself a pariah within a community. Granted divination comes from the divine, it is considered a very Pagan and “backwater” tactic to communicate with the Gods and Goddesses of old, not something the Church wanted to see or hear.

Is divination bad? No. I think it’s good to be able to see a couple steps ahead but I do recommend that if your religion doesn’t feel the same way that I do, for the love of all that is cute and sparkly, don’t ask for a reading! Nothing irks me more than some faithful person prattling out a soliloquy that’s “supposed” to be directed at me because they’re uncomfortable breaking the obvious rules in their religion. It’s super annoying.  

Now this question is fairly paraphrased for conciseness, posed by Afro-Punk and Black Pagans group member Nandi. Her question is this basically:

How do you deal with parental units who do not agree with your path in Paganism/Wicca? My dad says I will regret it.

Ah, the parental units not agreeing with your faith. A very stressful task indeed. You can’t really make people see things the way you do, no matter how much you want to try to convince them. Especially when it comes to faith, it’s a tougher climb uphill because religion is what people solidify their lives, beliefs and foundations on, especially when you’re part of one of the Abrahamic religion (Christianity, Judaism, Islam). Nandi is from a Muslim family but the issues that she brings up I have heard pretty often, especially from Monolithic religions which often tout the “Only one true path” ideal and the one truth path they believe is the right one is usually theirs.

My suggestion depends on whether you live at home or not. Since the kitty’s already out of the bag, the only thing you can keep doing is keep doing you and showing your parent you’re not at all interested in killin’ rabbits and hamsters for Satan and you’re not going to become some crazy cutter or an evil child. If they have questions, answer them honestly and make sure they respect you for you and your faith. So long you aren’t doing anything reprehensible or wicked, you can make your point for the most part and hope for the best. Remember, don’t throw anything in the parent’s face, just be moderate about it all.

That’s Ask Black Witch for this month! Thank you everyone for dealing with the hectic-ness of the BWA voting and donating, it was very much an experience. Live ceremony on July 9th!

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Call Me Now For Your Free Reading

Filed under: Divination, Pagan Life — 10 Comments
June 3, 2011

First and foremost, I’m still hockin for votes and donations (only $500 left to go!) for the Black Weblog Awards, more details at bottom.

So I’m sure everyone has heard of stuff like The Psychic Friends Network, Miss Cleo and other pseudo-psychics. They’re funny for me to look at because they’re so full of crap but I wonder (and worry a little) for the people who really buy into them and call asking about their love lives, careers, so on and so forth. I feel bad for those people because they’re being fleeced and lied to at the same time – kinda like paying taxes.

I was watching The Bernie Mac Show one night and the Psychic Friends Network commercial came on. It was some lady that looked like – or actually was – Vivica A. Fox and a bunch of bright-eyed nobodies that were overly enthused by their “personal psychic”. You can call, text or email them day or night, whenever you feel (at a hefty fee, of course) and get the skinny on your life and your future. And you’re even going to get “world famous” psychics too! Ooo! Aaaaah!

Get real. Firstly, this thing is just a load of crap, you can tell by how the commercial is being conducted to sound larger than life and your only once-in-a-lifetime chance to get a lead in your own future with your own “personal” psychic. It’s like being a queen or a king with a loyal and powerful druid at your side. C’mon now, I’m a real psychic and I think even I have said in my very first post that I would set down ground rules about being called around the clock over some simple nonsense that most certainly can wait until I wake up and at least brush my teeth, go to work/school, have something to eat and perhaps look at something entertaining first. There is no psychic that I personally know that would like to have a doctor’s on-call schedule. We never would get any sleep, especially with the “right here, right now” consumer culture that dominates the Western world.

Since the psychic is your “friend,” I wonder if they would get a day to vent. That for a 30% per half-hour discount, you can hear about the psychic’s day and worries whenever they need to talk. Just because we can see into the future don’t mean things are any better. Hmmm, I see…a bill…from AT&T…it’s-it’s my cell phone bill and …and it’s gonna be hefty as usual, can I call up my non-psychic friend and whine about that? They’re already whining to me about their problems, why can’t I do the same? Oh wait, I do. I have real friends, the people these folks are talking to are just doing a job. No true interest except to keep the lights on.

I’ve never paid for a reading a day in my life. As a matter of fact, I never bothered with divination of any sort until I got into myself.  I noticed the Ms. Cleo commercials when I was younger and man was that chick off. I could tell myself and I didn’t know anything about tarot cards then! The meanings were super vague; she guessed her way through readings and still sounded correct. Shame on Ms. Cleo for running game on a fool but shame on that fool for getting ran on so easily.

If you’re getting a reading, the reader should be on point about what’s going on, not talking like a Sphinx or over-generalizing like “You will experience a downfall after much greatness.” They should also be able to talk about things that don’t have anything to do with money, love or career and not sound wishy-washy. This is not what is supposed to be coming out of their mouths: “Oh! You have a mysterious lover! He’s handsome, rich and famous!” or “There is this beautiful woman. She’s charming, mysterious and will subject to your every whim.” That sounds like a jip already because they’re playing to your (faulty) wants. Be realistic. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

While it is a special pastime of mine to poke fun at phone psychics, parlor psychics and mall psychics, some of these guys are real psychics who just want to pay the bills somehow while the others are just conning hard to get you to pay more. Then there are those who are good at what they do but simply became greedy.

One of my friends, Ro we’ll call him, got bit pretty bad by the economy. He was fired from his previous job at a nice metaphysical shop because the boss became jealous and petty, his fiancée was working at a job that didn’t pay enough to foot the bills and both were fresh college graduates. When Ro told me he decided to be a phone psychic, I laughed because I thought he was joking. They’re the very people we make fun of because they make real diviners look bad, he’s got to be kidding. Apparently he wasn’t, gotta pay the bills somehow and happy thoughts don’t count for currency. He didn’t like the job either because it was a bit sketchy, even in pay, but money’s gotta come from somewhere and it’s not coming from the sky anytime soon. That part I understood so while I didn’t get any nicer about phone psychics as a whole, I did respect and understand Ro’s choice to do what he could to make ends meet. He’s a great psychic; I relied on him when I needed some insight I couldn’t give myself so I knew he’d do fine. Ro came to me about the job because he needed references, just like any other job and he figured that I would be a good pick because I’m honest. I simply told him that this is fine, just keep it temporary and until he can find better work.

It wasn’t long before drama was happening with the new boss. Ro was a serious diviner and casted stones as his main way of divination, geomancy. My friend is always on point and this paid off well in the calls he got but pay was a little weird. There was competition and he wanted out because the people who would call him were pretty annoying. Thankfully this lasted about a half year to a year before he found something better, a stable paying and normal job to help himself and his fiancée with the bills and a better place to live. He too thought the phone psychic business was a scam but it also was the only paying thing so he went with it till something better came along.

I have to say, if you want to get a reading so bad, hang out at a metaphysics shop, form a friendship with a diviner and get a reading from a friend you trust. Oooooor you can teach yourself this stuff. I did and I’ve been doing pretty well. When looking at parlors and mall psychics, avoid anything that seems too overdone and stereotypically “magical”. Drapes with moons and stars on them, crystal balls (I still haven’t a single clue how to scry, especially in those things) and older women who got the aura of a desperate car salesman. Next time I’ll post my “Faker Faker: How to Spot a Con” that I wrote for my university’s Pagan Student Union. For me, I don’t mind doing spreads for friends, artistic favorites/people I admire or anyone who asks nicely (i.e., gives me an okonomiyaki) because it’s better than having them go to some con like a poor friend of mine did. I like helping people whenever I can and this is one way how I do it.

I used to run on FortMinor.com a dream thread that’s now gone (And I should have saved! *sob*). That was my interpretation thread. You post your dream in and I would interpret it for you. You could have me PM you if possible because you’re afraid of having stuff put out there but  that’s what I did for about a year. It was really nice the people that I helped over that time and they appreciated having a diviner around that knew what they were doing. In addition, I would also answer questions about how the brain worked during sleep, the function of dreams and other non-dream interpretation related things. I was often asked of the “devil sitting on your chest”, which is just sleep paralysis usually because your brain shuts down a sector that controls movement so you don’t go running about in your sleep and you pretty much woke up before your body does, thus the paralysis. And I would often get the “I never dream, so there” people. They really are foolish because you have a couple hundred dreams a night, you only can remember the last three or four because of the stage of sleep your brain was in. There is a science behind sleeping, y’know. I like studying psychology and biology so it works out for me in helping people and not sounding like an utter quack. What people often didn’t know was that I sometimes needed various dream dictionaries because different backgrounds interpret the same thing differently. There’s a dream dictionary for girls, Jews, Blacks, an all-around dream dictionary, there’s many different ones. I would tell the folks in my thread the books I use so they could use it too and even bother me less.

I think what gets people to call these phone psychics and visit overdone psychic parlors or mall psychics is the mysticism that they perceive diviners have. That we have powers from the “other side” and we live in a world completely separate (but parallel) to that of normal people. I’ve had people look at me sideways when I would read for them because they wondered why I wasn’t in special clothes like a cloak or anything. As much as I would like to look like I jacked Captain EO’s cape and sputter complete and total nonsense, I don’t think it would benefit either of us. It would be a disservice to the person I’m reading for and a complete waste of my time, I can act like a fool later. When I’m home, I’m doing divination in my pajamas and over a soda on my bed, not in some special place. Not even my cat is doing anything but being a nuisance by deciding to kick some of the cards out of order and then sleep on them. I write out the interpretations while watching “Everybody Hates Chris” and type them up on my laptop as I peruse YouTube, any lolita fashion site, and my livejournal blog. Not very mysterious now is it? It generally ain’t. My divination book, the “book” itself is just a green, three-pronged folder with paper in it (and Saul Williams’ autograph on the back pages! It was all I had at the time and wanted him to sign something because he’s completely awesome. Now my divy book is awesomer than before!) It seems like the less fancier the diviner, the better the reading because at least it will be honest.

A good diviner is not trying to trick you into anything. They’re not trying to rob you blind or scare you witless (in effort to rob you blind) but simply give advice. That’s all it is, advice given based on your current situation, what the past has brought and what the future might bring. A good diviner helps people because it is right but also makes sure to the best of their abilities that you don’t have to keep coming back again and again. If you have to come back to me about five times for the same issue, there must be a bigger problem at hand or you’re thaaaaat dense. You, the person getting the reading, should feel confident that the diviner isn’t a sham by fishing for information so they can look legit or trying to string you along. The diviner should be able to explain their readings clearly and answer any question that you may have to the best of their abilities. It’s your reading so you should be clear on what’s going on since it’s your life that’s being affected. The diviner shouldn’t be trying to rack you up a nice and hefty bill to pay, that’s scamming, and they shouldn’t be trying to scare you into giving over your goods, that’s racketeering. Basically, the diviner should act like a level headed person, not one of the greatest wonders of the world or a total schizoid.

If you find a good diviner, stick with them and don’t forget to treat them like a person. I personally like being bribed with snacks to do natal charts, help people interpret their dreams over bubble tea and I prefer to know a person beyond what I’m reading them for unless it’s strictly business, such as me divining for an event. If you plan on going back to the same diviners again and again, I would recommend making friends with them. It would really ease the bond and they could help further. Plus it won’t seem so much like work for them rather than helping out a friend – if they don’t mind turning a business relationship into a friendship, that is.

Welp, that’s the column for this week! I just want to say thank you to everyone who has voted and to please spread the word about Black Witch so I can take home the Black Weblog Award in Faith. This BW post has all the details about voting and donating and there will be a new post about it all in the near future. Only $500 dollars is left needed to complete the goal to send me to L.A. for the first ever Black Weblog Awards Ceremony. Any donations is kind, whether big or small it doesn’t matter.

If you don’t feel like looking at the BW post or already know what to do, go on and vote or donate.

Next week is the first year anniversary for Black Witch. I will be making a post to celebrate that, it’ll be fun. I wanted to do giveaways and vcasts about it but I’m not sure if those will be possible given I have had such a lack in time and opportunity. That also means the pre-orders for Black Witch’s first book Black Witch: Life From the Black Pagan Perspective, vol. 1 will be delayed to July 9th so I can get everything together better.

After that are the installment posts, The Arts and Ask Black Witch. You know how to submit to ABW:

Submit, vote, donate and be happy.

Oh, and if you already voted on computer but have a smartphone or tablet, use your QR Reader (Here’s a list of them if you don’t, I use Neoreader) and vote there.

Use the QR Code to vote for Black Witch in the Faith Category

 Is there any issues with the code or voting on your phone? Lemme know in the comments.

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Ask Black Witch

Filed under: AfroPunk/The Establishment, Ask Black Witch, Coming out of the Broom Closet, Pagan Life — 4 Comments
May 27, 2011

The Establishment (Afro-Punk) Version

So, I’m doing some research for an English paper about the African American Wiccan experience. However, the deeper I dive the less I find about the subject (thank Goddess for the African American Wiccan Society). What gives? There must be more information and I know we exist!
 
1. How would you describe your experience as a black Witch?
 
2. What do you think about the almost nonexistent information describing our experiences and giving us advice?
– S.

Oooh, an English paper. I know how you feel about wanting to find extensive information about the Black Pagan experience, there seemed to be a complete drought when I was looking myself when I was starting out. I remember before Black Witch or even the Black Pagan group on Afro Punk, I found myself ultimately frustrated that there seemed to be nothing there for Black Pagans. Plenty for White Pagans but if you wanna talk about Africana stuff and Black culture, it seemed to be an empty place. I have looked endlessly on the web, in books, in stores, wherever you could for Black Pagan groups and it seems they’ve only just started to pop up recently. I believe African American Wiccans has been around for ten years but as a list proc on Yahoo since 2001 but I never happened upon them once until Black Witch came to be and a reader suggested me to them. I would search endlessly for “Black Pagan” on Google with just about nothing worth reading coming out of it. I think the issue is 50/50 in regards to the internet as a whole and the Black cyber culture.

1. My experience as a Black Witch? Well, it’s a pretty fulfilling experience for me. Despite my problems and issues that life likes chucking to any and everyone, I am definitely happier here than I was when I was Christian. I feel a better connection to what it is that I am doing, everything doesn’t seem so pointless and I feel more spiritual, in that I am practicing something I truly feel, not something I was told to do so religion doesn’t feel like a chore. That’s a lot more I’m getting out of it than I would have when I was Christian. When I was Christian, I was totally miserable no matter what I did to solve it. I went to church, got saved (three times), read the Bible, etc etc etc. Wasn’t cutting it for me. I wanted the same kind of faith that I saw my favorite band P.O.D. had: honest, sincere and fulfilling and I wasn’t getting that at all from Christianity. I’m happier as a Witch because Chrisitianity didn’t work out for me but Paganism sure did. Christianity is a nice religion (when not bogged down with stupidity as it commonly is) but not a religion for every soul on this earth.

2. I think there is a well of information but it’s like oil, gotta hit it first and it has to have worth or else it’s just another thing. Since Black Witch, like I said, I’ve been introduced to more Black Pagan groups than anything but that’s in part because readers will tell me “Hey, I’ve been interested in this stuff too, here’s the website I go to/book I read/metaphysical store I visit” but that’s mainly because they know I exist. I attribute the success of my column/blog to the fact there’s no easily accessible trove of information about Black Pagans (I use present tense and not past tense because it’s still hard and we have more of a force now than then) and the fact that this is one of the few very kinda easily accessable sites there are about the Black Pagan Experience on the net. I can promise you that there are more sites about this, spend some time on African American Wiccan society but they’re not really given a voice. There’s a multitude of reasons why:

Too small and exclusive:
When you look around the Important Links on Afr. Am. Wiccan Society, you’ll see lots of little pockets of Black Pagans getting together. That’s great we have so many but it can be a problem too because we have so many. Without the help of sites like AAWS, there would be just about nothing to reel them in (I certainly can’t always do it) and showcase them. Also another issue I noticed is that they don’t provide true glimpses into those communities, either register or leave. I understand wanting to keep the trolls out but everyone else should at least be able to see something that will give anyone that happens upon those sites something to chew on. I think they should have a way for people to lurk without being members, it would probably help.

Poorly advertised:
Black and Pagan with a site? It seems people are just waiting for BET or Black America Web to stroll by and pick them up – which is just about never going to happen without some forceful nudging or a terrible gimmick. Most people who run sites like these aren’t advertising them very well for the average Black Pagan to find them. The term Black Witch still does not return positive results for Black Pagans – actually, before the Afro-Punk group Black Pagans (which I started, yayz!), it was just as bad, no responses or hits for actual Black (as in African-Diaspora) Pagan…just tons for black magick, gimmicky hexes and other stuff that I really didn’t need to see, especially at a young age. Yes, there was the one page on Witchvox a Black Pagan wrote about her experience but no groups and no way to socialize. If someone has a site, they should advertise and well. Submit to Google, Yahoo, and other search engines. Plus sites like Black Witch and African American Wiccan Society, the fairly recognizable sites of the Black Pagan experience it seems, have started within a year ago basically. Thanks to sites like WordPress, Blogger, Twitter, Facebook and other sites, a more vibrant voice of the Black Pagan experience can come through and interconnect us to each other and to the rest of the world. I know the blog Black Pagan has just started up (I’ll feature it but first I need that site to exist for about two months with consistent posting before I slap it up here) and I’m sure there are more that are going on. These developments are pretty recent tho so there are projects and works, time just has to pass first.

Black America Online:
If I say “Black Faith blogs”, the average person is going to think either about Christianity or even Islam. (Wanna change the face of Black belief? Vote for me at Black Weblog Awards in the Faith Category) Black Pagans just get tossed off to the side as the “Voodoo lady” of faith systems. Through the lens of the Black faith, Black Pagans are supposed to not exist (because we’re all Christian![/sarcasm]) and if we do, we’re supposed to be weird, extremely Afro-Centric to the point of being extremist, backwards with our African backwater rituals and killin’ goats in our backyards where we make voodoo dolls to get back our neighbors for having a nice car and rattling a jar of bones just to talk to a tree for the answers to our problems. Basically, a Black Pagan is supposed to be Calypso from Pirates of the Carribbean and most likely really crazy. I have had hard times getting into writing guilds for Black writers and getting new readers sometimes because *gasp*, I’m not Christian and I practice Witchcraft. Zomgz, how am I not catching fire when I set foot in a church? We as Blacks have a looooooooooooooooooong way to go in showcasing all of the African Diaspora and to be truly Black publications instead of being sometimes only secondhand to mainstream (and pretty White) media. Not everyone who has money is a rapper and not every person who has African descent naturally knows how to greet people with a, “Sup son? Gotta be runnin’ papers fa’ real fa’ real, nahmean bwoy? Ya’know howz’be, mahn.” When Black America figures out that hood culture does not mean Black culture (but Black culture is within hood culture and that’s it, not the other way around) and showcases it online and offline, we’ll do better. Till then, Black Pagans just keep putting their names out there till someone picks up. Already having Black Witch on Afro-Punk is a big help (that’s actually where BW got started).

Trapped in the broom closet:
If you’re a Black Pagan, chances are stupidly good you probably know at least two to three scriptures (even if you don’t know where they are in the Bible), a few hymns and a Negro Spiritual passionate enough to pass for a Christian. Black Christianity is pretty strong, don’t doubt that. While it has its benefits such as being the cornerstone and starting place of Black leadership and a lynchpin to the Black community, it can also be a daunting force for anyone who isn’t Christian. Daunting enough to make actual Black Pagans learn a few hymns and fake it so not to get disowned, to keep the peace and not become an insta-pariah in their community. With very few resources and places to feel at ease to express true religious affiliation, most Black Pagans’ faiths are put through a limbo. Because a lot of Black Pagans are scared to talk about their faith openly (I have gotten plenty letters from people who used screenames, pseudonyms and other ways to cover up their identities to talk to me and this is actually why I allow physical mail too), it makes the pool of Black Pagans look smaller. That’s not fair and pretty bigoted if anyone thinks it is. If Black Pagans aren’t talking, nothing is happening. I can see why though, from my own experience pushing Black Witch I’ve been met with some pretty disheartening responses from Blacks who would much rather Black Witch just be another Black Christian blog. I got a backbone and thick skin for that but what about Black Pagans who aren’t so steeled against disdain? Nothing is wrong with being in the broom closet but not always and definitely not forever.

The online Pagan world:
The online Pagan world is mostly White. All, if not most mainstream Pagan magazines are White. Paganism as a whole still carries a White face. Since this is what is depicted as the face of Paganism and the authority of the how’s and what’s of the religion, they get mail from Black Pagans as well and are fairly stumped in answering beyond blanket answers (“go look around on the internet, you’ll find someone”). Since I don’t think those sites necessarily know that Black Pagan sites exist, they can’t really direct their Black Pagan readers around very well. Without well-known thresholds to connect us, we have a harder time finding each other and an easier time feeling like we’re the only one of our kind.

There’s a lot of empty spaces when it comes to info about the Black Pagan experience but with the advent of the internet and all that it comes with, it’s getting easier to make content and to find content. Also – shameless plug – to build a better vantage point for Pagan blogs, vote for mine in the Black Weblog Awards in the Faith category (#6)! More Black Pagan resources are popping up or simply being more visible which is a great thing for future Black Pagans and those curious.

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